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Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.

Artie Lange

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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Googling
Predict
Depressed
Early
Talk
Death
Firsts
First

More quotes by Artie Lange

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I want to see Toby Maguire fight Christian Bale.
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But I live an interesting life and I can tell a pretty good story and it has helped my career. But the downside is people know everything.
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'Course the world of sports takes itself way too serious. Sports writers are all high and mighty.
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It's not a drug problem, until you run out of money. Until then it's just drugs.
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It's good to be alive.
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If you are a black woman, you get two history months in a row.
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I have been in a lot of movies, but none of them are critics' darlings, you might say.
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Don't do drugs to be cool, do 'em because you hate yourself.
Artie Lange
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It's a life of five-card draw, and you know what? When God asked me - I'm fine with the card I got. I'm gonna play this.
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I quit drinking, and I figure if I go to ten Yankee games this year without drinking I'll save $32,000.
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Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that
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You know how screwed up censorship is, two girls just agreed to make out naked in front of their fathers, and we went wait, don't curse.
Artie Lange
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A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.
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Frank Sebastiano is a real write. He has two Emmys, one from 'SNL' and the other from 'The Chris Rock Show' . The only award I have is an FM-mmy.
Artie Lange
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I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy angel dust
Artie Lange
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Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.
Artie Lange
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When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life.
Artie Lange
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I'm the type of guy where one thing leads to another and eventually it gets awful. If I put a $5 bet on a roulette table tonight at 10 o'clock, by tomorrow at noon I would be running guns to Cuba.
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The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.
Artie Lange
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The only reason I can't recommend heroin to kids is because the effects wear off.
Artie Lange