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The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.

Artie Lange

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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Sometimes
Moderation
Drinking
Drink
Point

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At the Mirage Sportsbook, you can get a line on 2 kid playing wiffleball in the backyard in Minnesota
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But I live an interesting life and I can tell a pretty good story and it has helped my career. But the downside is people know everything.
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Women will do anything Oprah Winfrey says, and that is why we can't have women voting.
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You know how screwed up censorship is, two girls just agreed to make out naked in front of their fathers, and we went wait, don't curse.
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If Mike Tyson was the voice of your GPS, would you ever not use it?
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Whiskey will always be a part of my life.
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I quit drinking, and I figure if I go to ten Yankee games this year without drinking I'll save $32,000.
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I'm the type of guy where one thing leads to another and eventually it gets awful. If I put a $5 bet on a roulette table tonight at 10 o'clock, by tomorrow at noon I would be running guns to Cuba.
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I snorted heroin once by accident. It was amazing. But kids, don't snort heroin. It's too good.
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I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy angel dust
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Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.
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Frank Sebastiano is a real write. He has two Emmys, one from 'SNL' and the other from 'The Chris Rock Show' . The only award I have is an FM-mmy.
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Jason Alexander is a committed actor, he went from working on a show about nothing to actually doing nothing.
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Don't do drugs to be cool, do 'em because you hate yourself.
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I got into comedy so I could stay out all night.
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If you are a black woman, you get two history months in a row.
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It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world
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All I can say is that you only realize how big your mountain is once youre laying motionless, helpless, and hopeless in the valley below. No one goes there on purpose, if you get what Im saying, because the only way to find your personal low is to slip and roll down that mountain of yours, straight through to the bottom, no holds barred.
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The only reason I can't recommend heroin to kids is because the effects wear off.
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I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.
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