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Whiskey will always be a part of my life.

Artie Lange

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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Whiskey
Part
Always
Life

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If Mike Tyson was the voice of your GPS, would you ever not use it?
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I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.
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I'm the type of guy where one thing leads to another and eventually it gets awful. If I put a $5 bet on a roulette table tonight at 10 o'clock, by tomorrow at noon I would be running guns to Cuba.
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I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy angel dust
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It's not a drug problem, until you run out of money. Until then it's just drugs.
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At the Mirage Sportsbook, you can get a line on 2 kid playing wiffleball in the backyard in Minnesota
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Women will do anything Oprah Winfrey says, and that is why we can't have women voting.
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The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.
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But I live an interesting life and I can tell a pretty good story and it has helped my career. But the downside is people know everything.
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When you're on the road a lot, you're in perpetual search of a good night's sleep.
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I ain't apologizing for anything, especially if it's a joke.
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The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent.
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The only reason I can't recommend heroin to kids is because the effects wear off.
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When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life.
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Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.
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Historically, a successful life in comedy is a dream that's as equally pondered and unpursued as being an astronaut.
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Jason Alexander is a committed actor, he went from working on a show about nothing to actually doing nothing.
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I was always a thin kid I was an athlete.
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