Quote

I don't mind 800 million Chinese drinking a bottle [of Coca-Cola] a day, but I don't want them to bring back the empties.

Art Buchwald

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Art Buchwald
Age: 81 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 20
Died: 2007
Died: January 17
Columnist
Essayist
Humorist
Journalist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Mount Vernon
New York
Home
Bottle
Back
Bottles
Mind
Chinese
Drinking
Million
Travel
Empties
Millions
Cola
Bring
Coca

More quotes by Art Buchwald

Image
People ask what I am really trying to do with humor. The answer is, I'm getting even
Art Buchwald
Image
An economist is a man who knows a hundred ways of making love but doesn't know any women.
Art Buchwald
Image
This is what makes me happy: Remembering where I put my house keys.
Art Buchwald
Image
The best way to clean up a son's room is to close the door and pretend it's not part of the house.
Art Buchwald
Image
The most important thing about writing a book is having book parties.
Art Buchwald
Image
I don't know what's coming next and neither does anyone else. It's something that we do have to face but the thing is that a lot of people don't want to face it. And there's denial. If somebody says it, like me, everybody feels a little better that they can discuss it.
Art Buchwald
Image
If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.
Art Buchwald
Image
I don't know whether it's normal or not, but sex has always been something that I take seriously. I would put it higher than tennis on my list of constructive things to do.
Art Buchwald
Image
Have you ever seen a candidate talking to a rich person on television?
Art Buchwald
Image
I look at life as being cruise director on the Titanic. I may not get there, but I'm going first class.
Art Buchwald
Image
The things that matter most are not things.
Art Buchwald
Image
When I got to the hospice I was under the impression it would be a two- or three-week stay. But here I still am, six weeks later, and I've gotten so well Medicare won't pay for me anymore.
Art Buchwald
Image
I like champagne because it always tastes as though my foot's asleep.
Art Buchwald
Image
The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.
Art Buchwald
Image
If President Nixon's secretary, Rosemary Woods, had been Moses' secretary, there would only be eight commandments.
Art Buchwald
Image
I worship the quicksand he [Richard Nixon] walks in.
Art Buchwald
Image
Writing humor in my column isn't as dangerous as performing it. If I fail in front of a live audience, the humiliation is as great as anything a human being can suffer.
Art Buchwald
Image
Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
Art Buchwald
Image
Americans are just beginning to regard food the way the French always have. Dinner is not what you do in the evening before something else. Dinner is the evening.
Art Buchwald
Image
Any company executive who overcharges the government more than $5 million will be fined $50 or have to go to traffic school three nights a week
Art Buchwald