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If you're hung up on nostalgia, pretend today is yesterday and just go out and have one hell of a time.

Art Buchwald

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Art Buchwald
Age: 81 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 20
Died: 2007
Died: January 17
Columnist
Essayist
Humorist
Journalist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Mount Vernon
New York
Nostalgia
Hung
Pretend
Sadness
Yesterday
Hell
Today
Time
Admitting

More quotes by Art Buchwald

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Americans are just beginning to regard food the way the French always have. Dinner is not what you do in the evening before something else. Dinner is the evening.
Art Buchwald
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I worship the quicksand he [Richard Nixon] walks in.
Art Buchwald
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As the economy gets better, everything else gets worse.
Art Buchwald
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I don't know whether it's normal or not, but sex has always been something that I take seriously. I would put it higher than tennis on my list of constructive things to do.
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On the whole I woke up in the morning and was happy to be alive.
Art Buchwald
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I became a hero to everyone because I didn't take dialysis and was still alive.
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It was a dangerous profession I had chosen ... because no one likes a funny kid. In fact, adults are scared silly of them and tend to warn children who act out that they are going to wind up in prison or worse. It is only when you grow up that they pay you vast sums of money to make them laugh.
Art Buchwald
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This is not an easy time for humorists because the government is far funnier than we are.
Art Buchwald
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The things that matter most are not things.
Art Buchwald
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If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.
Art Buchwald
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The powder is mixed with water and tastes exactly like powder mixed with water.
Art Buchwald
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I have no idea where I'm going but here's the real question: What am I doing here in the first place?
Art Buchwald
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Writing humor in my column isn't as dangerous as performing it. If I fail in front of a live audience, the humiliation is as great as anything a human being can suffer.
Art Buchwald
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This is what makes me happy: Remembering where I put my house keys.
Art Buchwald
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Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
Art Buchwald
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... I could have said something profound, but you would have forgotten it in 15 minutes - which is the afterlife of a graduation speech.
Art Buchwald
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I always wanted to get into politics, but I was never light enough to make the team.
Art Buchwald
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I learned quickly that when I made others laugh, they liked me.
Art Buchwald
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If President Nixon's secretary, Rosemary Woods, had been Moses' secretary, there would only be eight commandments.
Art Buchwald
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The best things in life aren't things.
Art Buchwald