Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
An economist is a man who knows a hundred ways of making love but doesn't know any women.
Art Buchwald
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Art Buchwald
Age: 81 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 20
Died: 2007
Died: January 17
Columnist
Essayist
Humorist
Journalist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Mount Vernon
New York
Money
Women
Way
Men
Economist
Love
Hundred
Ways
Making
Doesn
More quotes by Art Buchwald
I didn't go on dialysis because I was 81 years old and I'd done everything I wanted, or so I thought.
Art Buchwald
The most important thing about writing a book is having book parties.
Art Buchwald
I have no idea where I'm going but here's the real question: What am I doing here in the first place?
Art Buchwald
I learned quickly that when I made others laugh, they liked me.
Art Buchwald
Sharing our depressions felt like having survived a war. The experience bonds you to the other person for life.
Art Buchwald
No one ever mentioned it, but thousands of men welcomed World War II as a way to escape their humdrum lives rather than a chance to fight for God and country.
Art Buchwald
Just when you think there's nothing to write about, Nixon says, I am not a crook. Jimmy Carter says, I have lusted after women in my heart. President Reagan says, I have just taken a urinalysis test, and I am not on dope.
Art Buchwald
I always wanted to get into politics, but I was never light enough to make the team.
Art Buchwald
Put yourself in Hamlet's shoes. Suppose you were a prince, and you came back from college to discover that your uncle had murdered your father and married your mother, and you fell in love with a beautiful girl and mistakenly murdered her father, and then she went crazy and drowned herself. What would you do? Go back for a masters?
Art Buchwald
I don't mind 800 million Chinese drinking a bottle [of Coca-Cola] a day, but I don't want them to bring back the empties.
Art Buchwald
The best things in life aren't things.
Art Buchwald
You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it.
Art Buchwald
When I got to the hospice I was under the impression it would be a two- or three-week stay. But here I still am, six weeks later, and I've gotten so well Medicare won't pay for me anymore.
Art Buchwald
The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.
Art Buchwald
If you're hung up on nostalgia, pretend today is yesterday and just go out and have one hell of a time.
Art Buchwald
I became a hero to everyone because I didn't take dialysis and was still alive.
Art Buchwald
I worship the quicksand he [Richard Nixon] walks in.
Art Buchwald
War for most men is not fighting or marching in parades. It is sitting around somewhere wondering what the hell you are supposed to be doing.
Art Buchwald
I look at life as being cruise director on the Titanic. I may not get there, but I'm going first class.
Art Buchwald
It was a dangerous profession I had chosen ... because no one likes a funny kid. In fact, adults are scared silly of them and tend to warn children who act out that they are going to wind up in prison or worse. It is only when you grow up that they pay you vast sums of money to make them laugh.
Art Buchwald
