Quote

... I could have said something profound, but you would have forgotten it in 15 minutes - which is the afterlife of a graduation speech.

Art Buchwald

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Art Buchwald
Age: 81 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 20
Died: 2007
Died: January 17
Columnist
Essayist
Humorist
Journalist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Mount Vernon
New York
Forgotten
Speech
Minutes
Something
Would
Afterlife
Graduation
Profound

More quotes by Art Buchwald

Image
People ask what I am really trying to do with humor. The answer is, I'm getting even
Art Buchwald
Image
Any company executive who overcharges the government more than $5 million will be fined $50 or have to go to traffic school three nights a week
Art Buchwald
Image
I learned quickly that when I made others laugh, they liked me.
Art Buchwald
Image
Any company executive who overcharges the government more than $5 million will be fined $50 or have to go to traffic school three nights a week
Art Buchwald
Image
I'm working when I'm fighting with my wife. I constantly ask myself-how can I use this stuff to literary advantage.
Art Buchwald
Image
On the whole I woke up in the morning and was happy to be alive.
Art Buchwald
Image
Don't commit suicide, because you might change your mind two weeks later.
Art Buchwald
Image
I became a hero to everyone because I didn't take dialysis and was still alive.
Art Buchwald
Image
This is what makes me happy: Remembering where I put my house keys.
Art Buchwald
Image
The powder is mixed with water and tastes exactly like powder mixed with water.
Art Buchwald
Image
The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.
Art Buchwald
Image
I didn't go on dialysis because I was 81 years old and I'd done everything I wanted, or so I thought.
Art Buchwald
Image
The things that matter most are not things.
Art Buchwald
Image
Sharing our depressions felt like having survived a war. The experience bonds you to the other person for life.
Art Buchwald
Image
I look at life as being cruise director on the Titanic. I may not get there, but I'm going first class.
Art Buchwald
Image
I became a hero to everyone because I didn't take dialysis and was still alive.
Art Buchwald
Image
This is not an easy time for humorists because the government is far funnier than we are.
Art Buchwald
Image
I don't know what's coming next and neither does anyone else. It's something that we do have to face but the thing is that a lot of people don't want to face it. And there's denial. If somebody says it, like me, everybody feels a little better that they can discuss it.
Art Buchwald
Image
While my friends were discussing Pearl Harbor as the country's problem, I took it personally. It dawned on me that the Japanese attack could be my ticket out of high school.
Art Buchwald
Image
I have no idea where I'm going but here's the real question: What am I doing here in the first place?
Art Buchwald