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I learned quickly that when I made others laugh, they liked me.

Art Buchwald

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Art Buchwald
Age: 81 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 20
Died: 2007
Died: January 17
Columnist
Essayist
Humorist
Journalist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Mount Vernon
New York
Made
Quickly
Liked
Laughter
Laugh
Laughing
Learned
Inspirational
Others

More quotes by Art Buchwald

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I became a hero to everyone because I didn't take dialysis and was still alive.
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I didn't go on dialysis because I was 81 years old and I'd done everything I wanted, or so I thought.
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I like champagne because it always tastes as though my foot's asleep.
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If you're hung up on nostalgia, pretend today is yesterday and just go out and have one hell of a time.
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The reason I don't play golf is because I was a caddie when I was 13. Women never gave up a golf ball that was lost somewhere in the trees and thicket and down through the poison ivy. It was during one of these searches that I vowed to the Lord above that if I ever earned enough money I would never set foot on a course again.
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Any company executive who overcharges the government more than $5 million will be fined $50 or have to go to traffic school three nights a week
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I'm working when I'm fighting with my wife. I constantly ask myself-how can I use this stuff to literary advantage.
Art Buchwald
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Writing humor in my column isn't as dangerous as performing it. If I fail in front of a live audience, the humiliation is as great as anything a human being can suffer.
Art Buchwald
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The most important thing about writing a book is having book parties.
Art Buchwald
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People ask what I am really trying to do with humor. The answer is, I'm getting even
Art Buchwald
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If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.
Art Buchwald
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Don't commit suicide, because you might change your mind two weeks later.
Art Buchwald
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The best way to clean up a son's room is to close the door and pretend it's not part of the house.
Art Buchwald
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Any company executive who overcharges the government more than $5 million will be fined $50 or have to go to traffic school three nights a week
Art Buchwald
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You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it.
Art Buchwald
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Americans are just beginning to regard food the way the French always have. Dinner is not what you do in the evening before something else. Dinner is the evening.
Art Buchwald
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Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
Art Buchwald
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When I got to the hospice I was under the impression it would be a two- or three-week stay. But here I still am, six weeks later, and I've gotten so well Medicare won't pay for me anymore.
Art Buchwald
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I don't know what's coming next and neither does anyone else. It's something that we do have to face but the thing is that a lot of people don't want to face it. And there's denial. If somebody says it, like me, everybody feels a little better that they can discuss it.
Art Buchwald
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Sharing our depressions felt like having survived a war. The experience bonds you to the other person for life.
Art Buchwald