Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
I worship the quicksand he [Richard Nixon] walks in.
Art Buchwald
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Art Buchwald
Age: 81 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 20
Died: 2007
Died: January 17
Columnist
Essayist
Humorist
Journalist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Mount Vernon
New York
Humorous
Worship
Walks
Powerful
Quicksand
Funny
Nixon
Richard
Witty
More quotes by Art Buchwald
This is not an easy time for humorists because the government is far funnier than we are.
Art Buchwald
The best way to clean up a son's room is to close the door and pretend it's not part of the house.
Art Buchwald
The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.
Art Buchwald
The best things in life aren't things.
Art Buchwald
Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
Art Buchwald
The most important thing about writing a book is having book parties.
Art Buchwald
On the whole I woke up in the morning and was happy to be alive.
Art Buchwald
I didn't go on dialysis because I was 81 years old and I'd done everything I wanted, or so I thought.
Art Buchwald
I'm working when I'm fighting with my wife. I constantly ask myself-how can I use this stuff to literary advantage.
Art Buchwald
The powder is mixed with water and tastes exactly like powder mixed with water.
Art Buchwald
As the economy gets better, everything else gets worse.
Art Buchwald
I don't know whether it's normal or not, but sex has always been something that I take seriously. I would put it higher than tennis on my list of constructive things to do.
Art Buchwald
I don't mind 800 million Chinese drinking a bottle [of Coca-Cola] a day, but I don't want them to bring back the empties.
Art Buchwald
Human beings thrive on action. Stagnation does not wear well with us. We are said to have our origins as hunter-gatherers. We run and we chase. We are problem-solvers. We must be continuously tested and we continuously test ourselves. And it will not end until our lives end because of life itself.
Art Buchwald
I always wanted to get into politics, but I was never light enough to make the team.
Art Buchwald
If President Nixon's secretary, Rosemary Woods, had been Moses' secretary, there would only be eight commandments.
Art Buchwald
Just when you think there's nothing to write about, Nixon says, I am not a crook. Jimmy Carter says, I have lusted after women in my heart. President Reagan says, I have just taken a urinalysis test, and I am not on dope.
Art Buchwald
The things that matter most are not things.
Art Buchwald
I look at life as being cruise director on the Titanic. I may not get there, but I'm going first class.
Art Buchwald
Writing humor in my column isn't as dangerous as performing it. If I fail in front of a live audience, the humiliation is as great as anything a human being can suffer.
Art Buchwald
