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I worship the quicksand he [Richard Nixon] walks in.
Art Buchwald
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Art Buchwald
Age: 81 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 20
Died: 2007
Died: January 17
Columnist
Essayist
Humorist
Journalist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Mount Vernon
New York
Nixon
Richard
Witty
Humorous
Worship
Walks
Powerful
Funny
Quicksand
More quotes by Art Buchwald
Human beings thrive on action. Stagnation does not wear well with us. We are said to have our origins as hunter-gatherers. We run and we chase. We are problem-solvers. We must be continuously tested and we continuously test ourselves. And it will not end until our lives end because of life itself.
Art Buchwald
The best things in life aren't things.
Art Buchwald
If you're hung up on nostalgia, pretend today is yesterday and just go out and have one hell of a time.
Art Buchwald
Don't commit suicide, because you might change your mind two weeks later.
Art Buchwald
The powder is mixed with water and tastes exactly like powder mixed with water.
Art Buchwald
Sharing our depressions felt like having survived a war. The experience bonds you to the other person for life.
Art Buchwald
On the whole I woke up in the morning and was happy to be alive.
Art Buchwald
I became a hero to everyone because I didn't take dialysis and was still alive.
Art Buchwald
An economist is a man who knows a hundred ways of making love but doesn't know any women.
Art Buchwald
I don't know what's coming next and neither does anyone else. It's something that we do have to face but the thing is that a lot of people don't want to face it. And there's denial. If somebody says it, like me, everybody feels a little better that they can discuss it.
Art Buchwald
I learned quickly that when I made others laugh, they liked me.
Art Buchwald
If President Nixon's secretary, Rosemary Woods, had been Moses' secretary, there would only be eight commandments.
Art Buchwald
When I got to the hospice I was under the impression it would be a two- or three-week stay. But here I still am, six weeks later, and I've gotten so well Medicare won't pay for me anymore.
Art Buchwald
I became a hero to everyone because I didn't take dialysis and was still alive.
Art Buchwald
War for most men is not fighting or marching in parades. It is sitting around somewhere wondering what the hell you are supposed to be doing.
Art Buchwald
The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.
Art Buchwald
The best way to clean up a son's room is to close the door and pretend it's not part of the house.
Art Buchwald
I'm working when I'm fighting with my wife. I constantly ask myself-how can I use this stuff to literary advantage.
Art Buchwald
I always wanted to get into politics, but I was never light enough to make the team.
Art Buchwald
No one ever mentioned it, but thousands of men welcomed World War II as a way to escape their humdrum lives rather than a chance to fight for God and country.
Art Buchwald