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This is not an easy time for humorists because the government is far funnier than we are.

Art Buchwald

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Art Buchwald
Age: 81 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 20
Died: 2007
Died: January 17
Columnist
Essayist
Humorist
Journalist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Mount Vernon
New York
Funnier
Humorists
Easy
Government
Time

More quotes by Art Buchwald

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The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.
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Sharing our depressions felt like having survived a war. The experience bonds you to the other person for life.
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I contemplated suicide. My main concern was that I would not make the New York Times obituary page.
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Put yourself in Hamlet's shoes. Suppose you were a prince, and you came back from college to discover that your uncle had murdered your father and married your mother, and you fell in love with a beautiful girl and mistakenly murdered her father, and then she went crazy and drowned herself. What would you do? Go back for a masters?
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Writing humor in my column isn't as dangerous as performing it. If I fail in front of a live audience, the humiliation is as great as anything a human being can suffer.
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As the economy gets better, everything else gets worse.
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The things that matter most are not things.
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I have no idea where I'm going but here's the real question: What am I doing here in the first place?
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I'm working when I'm fighting with my wife. I constantly ask myself-how can I use this stuff to literary advantage.
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I didn't go on dialysis because I was 81 years old and I'd done everything I wanted, or so I thought.
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... I could have said something profound, but you would have forgotten it in 15 minutes - which is the afterlife of a graduation speech.
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Have you ever seen a candidate talking to a rich person on television?
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I became a hero to everyone because I didn't take dialysis and was still alive.
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I learned quickly that when I made others laugh, they liked me.
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Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
Art Buchwald
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I became a hero to everyone because I didn't take dialysis and was still alive.
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You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it.
Art Buchwald
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I don't know what's coming next and neither does anyone else. It's something that we do have to face but the thing is that a lot of people don't want to face it. And there's denial. If somebody says it, like me, everybody feels a little better that they can discuss it.
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If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.
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War for most men is not fighting or marching in parades. It is sitting around somewhere wondering what the hell you are supposed to be doing.
Art Buchwald