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I'm interested in doing some acting in the future, but it's a distant second to stand up.

Anthony Jeselnik

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Anthony Jeselnik
Age: 45
Born: 1978
Born: December 22
Comedian
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Producer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Distant
Interested
Second
Stand
Acting
Future

More quotes by Anthony Jeselnik

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Tom Cruise's pre-nup lets him keep his money, the kids and Katie Holmes.
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I'll be very busy, which is all I need.
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I'm not a comedy writer, I'm a comedian, so I only write stuff that I would want to say.
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I like seeing what the comedian thinks is funny, not just what they think I'll think is funny.
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I will never understand how a mother can kill her own baby and not get away with it.
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I think brilliant stuff comes out of working with limitations. One liners are very limiting, but that's what drew me to them in the first place.
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I think my friend Jeff is gay. I don't know - I'm so bad with names.
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People are surprised that I'm nice and it helps me out a little bit it's easy to be nice when everyone thinks you're going to be a jerk but if people think you're a nice guy then it's tough because it's what they expect.
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Silence means they [the audience] are paying attention. Even if I drop bombs and they're dead quiet, it's still okay. If they start talking, that's when you've lost them.
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Every comic went through their Mitch Hedberg phase - the glasses, the hair in the face - and you knew immediately when they were doing it.
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My first time on stage was the class graduation at the Comedy Store. It was awesome. Everything got huge laughs and I just thought I knew how to do comedy.
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I feel like every first episode of a TV show is bad, you know, and it always improves.
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I love Austin, but last time I was in town for twelve hours. I was exhausted, drunk and miserable. But none of that was Austin's fault.
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I love Pittsburgh. Most of my family still lives there and I try to get back a couple of times a year.
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My sister is going to have a simple wedding. Just immediate family. And whoever the hell would want to marry her.
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Every Sunday my dad calls to ask if I went to church. And every Sunday I lie and say: Sorry. Wrong Number.
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I’m not a religious person I would call myself an atheist. I don’t have a good story behind it, I’m just reasonable.
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I was raised Catholic. I rejected it later on. I'm an outspoken atheist now. People say, 'Oh, it's a negative thing to be an atheist.' I don't agree. I think it's more optimistic to think that there is no God, no afterlife.
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You know how everybody has that one weird creepy uncle? Well, Seth Green looks like he got raped by all of them.
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2010 has been awesome. I got to write on the David Hasselhoff Roast this summer, and that's always been a dream.
Anthony Jeselnik