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You are never in love with anyone. You're only in love with your prejudiced and hopeful idea of that person.
Anthony de Mello
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Anthony de Mello
Age: 55 †
Born: 1931
Born: September 4
Died: 1987
Died: June 2
Philosopher
Priest
Psychologist
Theologian
Writer
Bombay
Love
Prejudiced
Hopeful
Anyone
Idea
Persons
Ideas
Person
Never
More quotes by Anthony de Mello
I seek the meaning of existence, said the stranger. You are of course assuming, said the Master, that existence has a meaning. Doesn't it? When you experience existence as it is - not as you think it is you will discover that your question has no meaning, said the Master.
Anthony de Mello
Suffering is given to you that you might open your eyes to the truth.
Anthony de Mello
What is love? The total absence of fear, said the Master What is it we fear? Love, said the Master.
Anthony de Mello
The words of the scholar are to be understood. The words of the master are not to be understood. They are to be listened to as one listens to the wind in the trees and the sound of the river and the song of the bird. They will awaken something within the heart that is beyond all knowledge.
Anthony de Mello
There were rules in the monastery, but the Master always warned against the tyranny of the law. 'Obedience keeps the rules,' he would say. 'Love knows when to break them.'
Anthony de Mello
Perfect love casts out fear. Where there is love there are no demands, no expectations, no dependency. I do not demand that you make me happy my happiness does not lie in you. If you were to leave me, I will not feel sorry for myself I enjoy your company immensely, but I do not cling.
Anthony de Mello
There is yet another illusion, that it is important to be respectable, to be loved and appreciated, to be important. Many say we have a natural urge to be loved and appreciated, to belong. That’s false. Drop this illusion and you will find happiness. We have a natural urge to be free, a natural urge to love, but not to be loved.
Anthony de Mello
If you look carefully you will see that there is one thing and only one thing that causes unhappiness. The name of that thing is attachment. What is an attachment? An emotional state of clinging caused by the belief that without some particular thing or some person you cannot be happy.
Anthony de Mello
The three most difficult things for a human being are not physical feats or intellectual achievements. They are, first, returning love for hate second, including the excluded third, admitting that you are wrong.
Anthony de Mello
I leave you free to be yourself: to think your thoughts, indulge your tastes, follow your inclinations, behave in ways that you decide are to your liking.
Anthony de Mello
The only way to change is by changing your understanding.
Anthony de Mello
You're not living until it doesn't matter a tinker's damn to you whether you live or die. At that point you live. When you're ready to lose your life, you live it.
Anthony de Mello
Can one talk about the ocean to a frog in a well or about the divine to people who are restricted by their concepts?
Anthony de Mello
You do not have to change for God to love you.
Anthony de Mello
Nothing has changed but my attitude, therefore, everything has changed.
Anthony de Mello
The Master made it his task to destroy systematically every doctrine, every belief, every concept of the divine, for these things, which were originally intended as pointers, were now being taken as descriptions. He loved to quote the Eastern saying When the sage points to the moon, all that the idiot sees is the finger.
Anthony de Mello
What is my identity ? Nothing, said the Master. You mean that I am an emptiness and a void? said the incredulous disciple. Nothing that can be labeled. said the Master.
Anthony de Mello
If the heart is unobstructed, the result is love.
Anthony de Mello
Wisdom can be learned. But it cannot be taught.
Anthony de Mello
The only way someone can be of help to you is in challenging your ideas.
Anthony de Mello
