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Rare indeed, is the relationship in which the other is not cultivated for what one can get for oneself.

Anthony de Mello

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Anthony de Mello
Age: 55 †
Born: 1931
Born: September 4
Died: 1987
Died: June 2
Philosopher
Priest
Psychologist
Theologian
Writer
Bombay
Oneself
Relationship
Love
Cultivated
Rare
Indeed

More quotes by Anthony de Mello

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The way to really live is to die. The passport to living is to imagine yourself in your grave. Imagine you're lying in your coffin....Now look at your problems from that viewpoint. Changes everything, doesn't it?
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The Rose does not preen herself to catch my eye. She blooms because she blooms. A saint is a saint until he knows he is one.
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One day, a philosopher asked, What is the purpose of creation? Lovemaking, said the Master. Later, to his disciples, he said, Before creation, love was. After creation, love was made. When love is consummated, creation will cease to be, and love will be forever.
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As the Arabs say, The nature of rain is the same, but it makes thorns grow in the marshes and flowers in the gardens.
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We're crazy, We're living on crazy ideas about love, about relationships, about happiness, about joy, about everything.
Anthony de Mello
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When someone offends you, you can raise your spirits to heights where offenses cannot reach.
Anthony de Mello
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All conflict comes from attachment.
Anthony de Mello
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When you cling, life is destroyed when you hold on to anything, you cease to live.
Anthony de Mello
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When you come to see you are not as wise today as you thought you were yesterday, you are wiser today.
Anthony de Mello
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As you identify less and less with the “me”, you will be more at ease with everybody and with everything. Do you know why? Because you are no longer afraid of being hurt or not liked. You no longer desire to impress anyone. Can you imagine the relief when you don't have to impress anybody anymore? Oh, what a relief. Happiness at last!
Anthony de Mello
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Pleasant experiences make life delightful. Painful experiences lead to growth.
Anthony de Mello
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You keep insisting, I feel good because the world is right! Wrong! The world is right because I feel good. That's what all the mystics are saying.
Anthony de Mello
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Isn't there such a thing as social liberation? Of course there is, said the Master. How would you describe it? Liberation from the need to belong to the herd.
Anthony de Mello
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A good teacher offers practice, a bad one offers theories.
Anthony de Mello
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Drop your false ideas. See through people. If you see through yourself, you will see through everyone. Then you will love them. Otherwise you spend the whole time grappling with your wrong notions of them, with your illusions that are constantly crashing against reality.
Anthony de Mello
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As soon as you look at the world through an ideology, you are finished. No reality fits ideology.
Anthony de Mello
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We do not have a fear of the unknown. What we fear is giving up the known.
Anthony de Mello
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When you get rid of your fear of failure, your tensions about succeeding... you can be yourself. Relaxed. You'll no longer be driving with your brakes on.
Anthony de Mello
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Those who make no mistakes are making the biggest mistakes of all - they are attempting nothing new.
Anthony de Mello
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The law is an expression of God 's holy will and as such must be honored and loved, said the preacher piously. Rubbish, said the Master. The law is a necessary evil and as such must be cut down to the barest minimum. Show me a lover of the law and I will show you a muttonheaded tyrant .
Anthony de Mello