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[I] have fantasies of killing myself and thus being the powerful one not the powerless one.

Anne Sexton

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Anne Sexton
Age: 45 †
Born: 1928
Born: November 9
Died: 1974
Died: October 4
Poet
Writer
Newton
Massachusetts
Anne Gray Harvey
Powerful
Fantasies
Powerless
Suicide
Thus
Killing
Fantasy

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... a starving man doesn't ask what the meal is.
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I have forgiven all the old actors for dying. A new one comes on with the same lines, like large white growths, in his mouth. The dancers come on from the wings, perfectly mated.
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The soul was not cured, it was as full as a clothes closet of dresses that did not fit.
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My husband sings Baa Baa black sheep and we pretend that all's certain and good, that the marriage won't end.
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I was the girl of the chain letter, the girl full of talk of coffins and keyholes, the one of the telephone bills, the wrinkled photo and the lost connections.
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I'm an empress. I wear an apron. My typewriter writes. It didn't break the way it warned. Even crazy, I'm as nice as a chocolate bar.
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Poetry to me is prayer.
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I try to take care and be gentle to them. Words and eggs must be handled with care. Once broken they are impossible things to repair.
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All day I've built a lifetime and now the sun sinks to undo it.
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But suicides have a special language. Like carpenters they want to know which tools. They never ask why build. Twice I have so simply declared myself, have possessed the enemy, eaten the enemy, have taken on his craft, his magic.
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And thus Snow White became the prince's bride. The wicked queen was invited to the wedding feast and when she arrived there were red-hot iron shoes, in the manner of red-hot roller skates, clamped upon her feet.
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There is a good look that I wear like a blood clot. I have sewn it over my left breast. I have made a vocation of it.
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Blue eyes wash off sometimes.
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I am crazy as hell, but I know it. And knowing it is a kind of sanity that makes the sickness worse.
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The stars are pears that no one can reach, even for a wedding. Perhaps for a death.
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I imitatea memory of beliefthat I do not own.
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Today is made of yesterday, each time I steal toward rites I do not know, waiting for the lost ingredient, as if salt or money or even lust would keep us calm and prove us whole at last.
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Rats live on no evil star
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Blind with love, my daughter has cried nightly for horses, those long-necked marchers and churners that she has mastered, any and all, reigning them in like a circus hand.
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The future is a fog that is still hanging out over the sea, a boat that floats home or does not.
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