Quote

Have you noticed that they put advertisements in with your bills now? Like bills aren't distasteful enough, they have to stuff junk mail in there with them. I get back at them. I put garbage in with my check when I mail it in. Coffee grinds, banana peels...I write, Could you throw this away for me?

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Stuff
Mail
Distasteful
Away
Check
Banana
Back
Checks
Advertisements
Enough
Coffee
Bananas
Writing
Bills
Grind
Like
Throw
Junk
Aren
Garbage
Peels
Write
Noticed
Grinds

More quotes by Andy Rooney

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A great many people do not have the right to their own opinion because they don't know what they are talking about.
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Person-to-person, most people are honest.
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Love is more pleasant once you get out of your twenties. It doesn't hurt all the time.
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I'm always on the lookout for something good about people. Often months go by.
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The fastest thing computers do is go obsolete.
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I've learned... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.
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Not many people in this world are as lucky as I've been. ... All this time I've been paid to say what is on my mind on television. You don't get any luckier in life than that.
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Half the cookbooks tell you how to cook the food and the other half tell you how to avoid eating it.
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Anyone should be very suspicious of a sentence he's written that can't be read aloud easily.
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Christians talk as though goodness was their idea but good behavior doesn't have any religious origin. Our prisons are filled with the devout.
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A cat's idea of a 'good time' is to kill something.
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I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some governmental stooge with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts for squirting out babies.
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The teacher who knows the most about a subject isn't necessarily the one who can teach it best.
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New ideas are one of the most overrated concepts of our time. Most of the important ideas that we live with aren't new at all.
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Some people who hated Americans set out to kill a lot of us and they succeeded [on 9/11]....We're trying to protect ourselves with more weapons. We have to do it, I guess, but it might be better if we figured out how to behave as a nation in a way that wouldn't make so many people in the world want to kill us.
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Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.
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I'm already suspicious of anyone who thinks he or she is smart enough to be president. You'd have to have some ego to believe that about yourself.
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We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers.
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If dogs could talk it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.
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Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, How can he want me the way I look in the morning? It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.
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