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One of the things we can be sure of over the July 4th weekend is that news reports will keep telling us how many of us are going to die in automobile accidents.
Andy Rooney
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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Sure
Dies
Automobile
Keep
July
Many
Weekend
Going
Reports
Things
Accidents
Telling
News
More quotes by Andy Rooney
Art is a by-product of an honest and successful attempt to do something well.
Andy Rooney
We should change our attitude toward the United Nations. There has to be some power in the world superior to our own. We should not have attacked Iraq without the okay of the United Nations. Now we have to live with that mistake. We're living with it, and too many of our guys are dying with it.
Andy Rooney
Never trust the food in a restaurant on top of the tallest building in town that spends a lot of time folding napkins.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... that just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.
Andy Rooney
Half the cookbooks tell you how to cook the food and the other half tell you how to avoid eating it.
Andy Rooney
If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
Andy Rooney
I obviously have a knack for getting on paper what a lot of people have thought and didn't realize they thought. And they say, 'Hey, yeah!' And they like that.
Andy Rooney
I think Dan [Rather] is transparently liberal. Now he may not like to hear me say that. I always agree with him, too. But I think he should be more careful.
Andy Rooney
We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't smart for them to continue waiting all their lives for him to come down the chimney with something wonderful. Santa Claus and God are cousins.
Andy Rooney
You're better off missing a bus or an airplane once in a while than you are getting there too early all the time.
Andy Rooney
If you do see me in a restaurant, please, just let me eat my dinner.
Andy Rooney
By the time they're ready to be thrown away, most shoes are thoroughly comfortable
Andy Rooney
It is possible to be dumb and be a college president.
Andy Rooney
A writer's job is to tell the truth.
Andy Rooney
Flying is always an unpleasant experience. You wait an hour for every ten minutes you actually spend getting anywhere.
Andy Rooney
I'd like to take some calculus, too. I have absolutely no ability in that direction and not much interest, either, but there's something going on in mathematics that I don't understand, and I'd like to find out what it is.
Andy Rooney
One of the sweetest things in life: a letter from a friend.
Andy Rooney
If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness.
Andy Rooney
Uh, yeah, this is the VD clinic calling. Speaking of being positive, your test is back. Stop sharing the love.
Andy Rooney
We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers. More college graduates ought to become plumbers or electricians, then go home at night and read Shakespeare.
Andy Rooney
