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You're almost always better off keeping your mouth shut, but don't let that stop you from popping off.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Always
Popping
Shut
Keeping
Mouth
Mouths
Stop
Almost
Better

More quotes by Andy Rooney

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I'm always on the lookout for something good about people. Often months go by.
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Dogs are nicer than people.
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Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.
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The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it!
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Those of us who don't have a party affiliation ought to be able to register under the heading Confused.
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People waiting for an elevator don't know what to do, standing with strangers. There is nothing to do. Its an uneasy time. Some press the button repeatedly as though it would help.
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Age is nothing but experience, and some of us are more experienced than others
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If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness.
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When I write, I use an Underwood #5 made in 1920. Someone gave me an electric typewriter, but there's no use pretending you can use machinery that thinks faster than you do. An electric typewriter is ready to go before I have anything to say.
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I've learned... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.
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In a conversation, keep in mind that you're more interested in what you have to say than anyone else is.
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I like animals who trust people.
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Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose.
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We're all torn between the desire for privacy and the fear of loneliness.
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We've sent a man to the moon and that's 29,000 miles away. The center of the Earth is only 4,000 miles away. You could drive that in a week but for some reason nobody's ever done it.
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Let's make a statement to the airlines just to get their attention. We'll pick a week next year and we'll all agree not to go anywhere for seven days.
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Last night we had three small zucchini for dinner that were grown within fifty feet of our back door. I estimate they cost somewhere in the neighborhood of $371.49 each.
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Nothing in fine print is ever good news.
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I've learned... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.
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I know a lot of you believe that most people in the news business are liberal. Let me tell you, I know a lot of them, and they were almost evenly divided this time. Half of them liked Senator Kerry the other half hated President Bush.
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