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In Washington, a confidential assistant is someone who, if you don't want to know something, you go and ask him and he won't tell you.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Assistant
Assistants
Washington
Asks
Tell
Someone
Government
Something
Confidential

More quotes by Andy Rooney

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Never trust the food in a restaurant on top of the tallest building in town that spends a lot of time folding napkins.
Andy Rooney
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We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers. More college graduates ought to become plumbers or electricians, then go home at night and read Shakespeare.
Andy Rooney
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Last night we had three small zucchini for dinner that were grown within fifty feet of our back door. I estimate they cost somewhere in the neighborhood of $371.49 each.
Andy Rooney
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If you do see me in a restaurant, please, just let me eat my dinner.
Andy Rooney
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Art is a by-product of an honest and successful attempt to do something well.
Andy Rooney
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I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some governmental stooge with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts for squirting out babies.
Andy Rooney
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I've learned... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.
Andy Rooney
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One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don't clean it up too quickly. ~ (1919-), American writer, producer, humorist.
Andy Rooney
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My advice is not to wait to be struck by an idea. If you're a writer, you sit down and damn well decide to have an idea. That's the way to get an idea.
Andy Rooney
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For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 40 +, there is a balding, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.
Andy Rooney
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I've learned... that just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.
Andy Rooney
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No one ever writes a book in which he is the bad guy.
Andy Rooney
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Don't rule out working with your hands. It does not preclude using your head.
Andy Rooney
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Don't take a butcher's advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he'd be a chef.
Andy Rooney
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Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
Andy Rooney
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Being kind is more important than being right.
Andy Rooney
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There are more beauty parlors than there are beauties.
Andy Rooney
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Most of the people in the world are good and decent if you give them a chance to be.
Andy Rooney
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Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
Andy Rooney
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The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it!
Andy Rooney