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If you get murdered because you go on a date with someone you met on the Internet, you probably deserved it.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Internet
Probably
Someone
Murdered
Deserved
Date
Mets

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No one ever writes a book in which he is the bad guy.
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I've learned... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.
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All men are not created equal but should be treated as though they were under the law.
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I've learned.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you... More
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Go to bed. Whatever you're staying up late for isn't worth it.
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Vegetarian: Indian word for lousy hunter.
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We should change our attitude toward the United Nations. There has to be some power in the world superior to our own. We should not have attacked Iraq without the okay of the United Nations. Now we have to live with that mistake. We're living with it, and too many of our guys are dying with it.
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It's paradoxical, that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn't appeal to anyone.
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the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.
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Never trust the food in a restaurant on top of the tallest building in town that spends a lot of time folding napkins.
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The closing of a door can bring blessed privacy and comfort - the opening, terror. Conversely, the closing of a door can be a sad and final thing - the opening a wonderfully joyous moment.
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It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.
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Bacon is clearly a food made by the Nazis to fatten up Americans. It has no nutritional value, is full of fat, sodium, and nitrates, and is a pathetic type of consumable made from the noblest of creatures.
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You can't be a good writer without being a good thinker.
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I like ice hockey, but it's a frustrating game to watch. It's hard to keep your eyes on both the puck and the players and too much time passes between scoring in hockey. There are usually more fights than there are points.
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Numbers tend to give the impression that there's more order in the world than there is.
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No one likes the house next door to look worse or a lot better than his own.
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My mother always called me 'sturdy' and said I have big bones. A little fat is what I am.
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It is possible to be dumb and be a college president.
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Love is more pleasant once you get out of your twenties. It doesn't hurt all the time.
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