Quote

People waiting for an elevator don't know what to do, standing with strangers. There is nothing to do. Its an uneasy time. Some press the button repeatedly as though it would help.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Help
Buttons
Helping
Strangers
Nothing
Presses
Would
Press
Elevator
Time
Stranger
Elevators
People
Standing
Repeatedly
Waiting
Uneasy
Though
Button

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There are only a few safe targets left, just a few groups of people you can say anything negative about without getting in trouble for it. I've made a list of safe targets and I probably ought to stick to those. Politicians, for instance. You can say anything you want about them, and it doesn't matter how unfair you are. People seem to like it.
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In the United States alone, we spend seven times as much on war as on education. There's something wrong there. On this Memorial Day, we should certainly honor those who have died at war, but we should dedicate this day, not so much to their memory, but to the search for a way to end the idiocy of the wars that killed them.
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I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran.
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I've learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
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I try to look nice. I comb my hair, I tie my tie, I put on a jacket, but I draw the line when it comes to trimming my eyebrows. You work with what you got.
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Don't you hate it when...your suitcase is the last one off the airplane?
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Bacon is clearly a food made by the Nazis to fatten up Americans. It has no nutritional value, is full of fat, sodium, and nitrates, and is a pathetic type of consumable made from the noblest of creatures.
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The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it!
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Let's make a statement to the airlines just to get their attention. We'll pick a week next year and we'll all agree not to go anywhere for seven days.
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Flying is always an unpleasant experience. You wait an hour for every ten minutes you actually spend getting anywhere.
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We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't smart for them to continue waiting all their lives for him to come down the chimney with something wonderful. Santa Claus and God are cousins.
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Death is a distant rumor to the young.
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Most college students are not as smart as most college presidents.
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I'd like to be rich enough so I could throw soap away after the letters are worn off
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My most serious character flaw is that I don't deny myself much.
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The fastest thing computers do is go obsolete.
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I've learned... that we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.
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People like to say, You're only as old as you feel, but it isn't true. It's just something old people say to make themselves feel good about their age. You're as old as you are.
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There are more beauty parlors than there are beauties.
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I can't choose how i feel. But i can choose what I do about it.
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