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Numbers tend to give the impression that there's more order in the world than there is.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Giving
World
Impression
Mathematics
Tend
Numbers
Order
Give

More quotes by Andy Rooney

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There are only a few safe targets left, just a few groups of people you can say anything negative about without getting in trouble for it. I've made a list of safe targets and I probably ought to stick to those. Politicians, for instance. You can say anything you want about them, and it doesn't matter how unfair you are. People seem to like it.
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New ideas are one of the most overrated concepts of our time. Most of the important ideas that we live with aren't new at all.
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A writer's job is to tell the truth.
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I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
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If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness.
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I obviously have a knack for getting on paper what a lot of people have thought and didn't realize they thought. And they say, 'Hey, yeah!' And they like that.
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We can all be prouder to be human beings, because that's what they were. They make up for a lot of liars, cheats, and terrorists among us.
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The English language is more complex than calculus because numbers don't have nuances.
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Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
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I am not retiring. Writers don't retire. Writers never stop writing.
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Don't take a butcher's advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he'd be a chef.
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Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.
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In the United States alone, we spend seven times as much on war as on education. There's something wrong there. On this Memorial Day, we should certainly honor those who have died at war, but we should dedicate this day, not so much to their memory, but to the search for a way to end the idiocy of the wars that killed them.
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I dislike loud-mouthed patriots who suggest they like our country more than I do. Some people's idea of patriotism is hating other countries.
Andy Rooney
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I've learned .... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.
Andy Rooney
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The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it!
Andy Rooney
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The fastest thing computers do is go obsolete.
Andy Rooney
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Soap, like people, shouldn't smell like anything.
Andy Rooney
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Before a kid learns how to use a computer that can solve mathematical problems, he or she should know how to do arithmetic without a computer.
Andy Rooney
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Death is a distant rumor to the young.
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