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When it comes to educating all of us about the most basic things in life, it seems to me we need more kindergartens and fewer graduate schools.
Andy Rooney
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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Life
Basic
Education
Comes
Educating
School
Kindergarten
Seems
Graduate
Need
Graduates
Needs
Fewer
Things
Schools
More quotes by Andy Rooney
I don't like food that's too carefully arranged it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting.
Andy Rooney
One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don't clean it up too quickly. ~ (1919-), American writer, producer, humorist.
Andy Rooney
Writers don't retire. I will always be a writer.
Andy Rooney
I never understood retirement. What is the attraction of retirement? I go down there to Florida and look around and I said, my God, who wants this? Not me.
Andy Rooney
One of my major shortcomings - I'm vindictive. I don't know why that is. Even in petty things in my life I tend to strike back. It's a lot more pleasurable a sensation than feeling threatened.
Andy Rooney
Those of us who don't have a party affiliation ought to be able to register under the heading Confused.
Andy Rooney
I'd like to take some calculus, too. I have absolutely no ability in that direction and not much interest, either, but there's something going on in mathematics that I don't understand, and I'd like to find out what it is.
Andy Rooney
When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper.
Andy Rooney
Uh, yeah, this is the VD clinic calling. Speaking of being positive, your test is back. Stop sharing the love.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.
Andy Rooney
Looking and not finding is certainly one of the most frustrating ways to spend time.
Andy Rooney
Unfortunately, propaganda works.
Andy Rooney
The best thing about a vacation is planning it.
Andy Rooney
Have you noticed that they put advertisements in with your bills now? Like bills aren't distasteful enough, they have to stuff junk mail in there with them. I get back at them. I put garbage in with my check when I mail it in. Coffee grinds, banana peels...I write, Could you throw this away for me?
Andy Rooney
It's ridiculous for a country to get all worked up about a game—except the Super Bowl, of course. Now that's important.
Andy Rooney
Did you ever hear one of those corny, positive messages on someone's answering machine? 'Hi, it's a great day and I'm out enjoying it right now. I hope you are too. The thought for the day is share the love.' Beep. 'Uh, yeah, this is the VD clinic. Speaking of being positive, your test is back. Stop sharing the love.'
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.
Andy Rooney
Don't rule out working with your hands. It does not preclude using your head.
Andy Rooney
I've learned .... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.
Andy Rooney
I had one typewriter for 50 years, but I have bought seven computers in six years. I suppose that's why Bill Gates is rich, and Underwood is out of business.
Andy Rooney
