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If you put on an item of clothing that hurts just because you have an idea it looks better or conforms to what other people are wearing, it's dumb.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Better
Clothing
Looks
Conform
People
Hurts
Wearing
Dumb
Conforms
Hurt
Item
Idea
Items
Ideas
Clothings

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We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers. More college graduates ought to become plumbers or electricians, then go home at night and read Shakespeare.
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The last birthday that's any good is 23.
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I think Dan [Rather] is transparently liberal. Now he may not like to hear me say that. I always agree with him, too. But I think he should be more careful.
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A cat's idea of a 'good time' is to kill something.
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All economists should be locked up until they admit that they don't know what they're talking about.
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... all of us talk faster than we listen.
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I've learned... That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away.
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I've learned... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.
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There are only a few safe targets left, just a few groups of people you can say anything negative about without getting in trouble for it. I've made a list of safe targets and I probably ought to stick to those. Politicians, for instance. You can say anything you want about them, and it doesn't matter how unfair you are. People seem to like it.
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I've learned... that we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.
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I've done a lot of complaining here, but of all the things I've complained about, I can't complain about my life.
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Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?
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Everyone hates war, everyone says.
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Last night we had three small zucchini for dinner that were grown within fifty feet of our back door. I estimate they cost somewhere in the neighborhood of $371.49 each.
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Familiar things are a comfort to us all.
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Don't take a butcher's advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he'd be a chef.
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I've learned... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.
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There are sixteen cans of coffee here together they hold a total of thirteen and a half pounds of coffee. Doesn't that seem like cheating?
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Figure skating is an unlikely Olympic event but its good television. It's sort of a combination of gymnastics and ballet. A little sexy too which doesn't hurt.
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In a conversation, keep in mind that you're more interested in what you have to say than anyone else is.
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