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It's ridiculous for a country to get all worked up about a game—except the Super Bowl, of course. Now that's important.
Andy Rooney
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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Except
Game
Courses
Course
Bowl
Games
Bowls
Country
Super
Important
Ridiculous
Worked
More quotes by Andy Rooney
Bacon is clearly a food made by the Nazis to fatten up Americans. It has no nutritional value, is full of fat, sodium, and nitrates, and is a pathetic type of consumable made from the noblest of creatures.
Andy Rooney
Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, How can he want me the way I look in the morning? It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.
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Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
Andy Rooney
My wife uses fabric softener. I never knew what that stuff was for. Then I noticed women coming up to me, sniffing, then saying under their breath, Married! and walking away. Fabric Softeners are how our wives mark their territory. We can take off the ring, but it's hard to get that April fresh scent out of your clothes.
Andy Rooney
Don't you hate it when...your suitcase is the last one off the airplane?
Andy Rooney
New ideas are one of the most overrated concepts of our time. Most of the important ideas that we live with aren't new at all.
Andy Rooney
I don't pick subjects as much as they pick me.
Andy Rooney
A great many people do not have the right to their own opinion because they don't know what they are talking about.
Andy Rooney
I've learned ... that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.
Andy Rooney
There are more beauty parlors than there are beauties.
Andy Rooney
We're all proud of making little mistakes. It gives us the feeling we don't make any big ones.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.
Andy Rooney
I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
Andy Rooney
Computers may save time but they sure waste a lot of paper. About 98 percent of everything printed out by a computer is garbage that no one ever reads.
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Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch.
Andy Rooney
There's nothing people like better than being asked an easy question. For some reason, we're flattered when a stranger asks us where Maple Street is in our hometown and we can tell him.
Andy Rooney
Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
Andy Rooney
Anyone should be very suspicious of a sentence he's written that can't be read aloud easily.
Andy Rooney
I mean, the notion that we must love everything in this country or get out and go someplace else is ridiculous. I mean, if you -- the best thing a patriotic American can do is to look and be critical and find out what's wrong and try to make it better. That's what a patriotic American does.
Andy Rooney
Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.
Andy Rooney
