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Don't you hate it when...your suitcase is the last one off the airplane?

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Suitcase
Suitcases
Airplane
Travel
Lasts
Last
Hate

More quotes by Andy Rooney

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When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper.
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Everyone hates war, everyone says.
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It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.
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I've learned... That money doesn't buy class.
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I'd like to take some calculus, too. I have absolutely no ability in that direction and not much interest, either, but there's something going on in mathematics that I don't understand, and I'd like to find out what it is.
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Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
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People waiting for an elevator don't know what to do, standing with strangers. There is nothing to do. Its an uneasy time. Some press the button repeatedly as though it would help.
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I'm already suspicious of anyone who thinks he or she is smart enough to be president. You'd have to have some ego to believe that about yourself.
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Don't take a butcher's advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he'd be a chef.
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A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, What are you thinking?. She doesn't care what you think.
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There are more beauty parlors than there are beauties.
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Looking and not finding is certainly one of the most frustrating ways to spend time.
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I never understood retirement. What is the attraction of retirement? I go down there to Florida and look around and I said, my God, who wants this? Not me.
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Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.
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I've done a lot of complaining here, but of all the things I've complained about, I can't complain about my life.
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There is obviously a great human need for religion because life seems to be such a mystery.
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Everyone starts out being an atheist. No one is born with belief in anything. Infants are atheists until they are indoctrinated.
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You're almost always better off keeping your mouth shut, but don't let that stop you from popping off.
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Figure skating is an unlikely Olympic event but its good television. It's sort of a combination of gymnastics and ballet. A little sexy too which doesn't hurt.
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I've learned... that just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.
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