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Don't take a butcher's advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he'd be a chef.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Cooking
Advice
Butcher
Food
Butchers
Knew
Chef
Take
Culinary
Cook
Cooks
Meat

More quotes by Andy Rooney

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A little-recognized value of listening and inquiring relates to the realization that in human relationships, it is frequently not what the I've learned ... that it is best to give advice in only two circumstances: when it is requested and when it is a life-threatening situation.
Andy Rooney
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I just wish this social institution [religion] wasnt based on what appears to me to be a monumental hoax built on an accumulation of customs and myths directed toward proving something that isnt true.
Andy Rooney
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I've learned .... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.
Andy Rooney
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People like to say, You're only as old as you feel, but it isn't true. It's just something old people say to make themselves feel good about their age. You're as old as you are.
Andy Rooney
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Bacon is clearly a food made by the Nazis to fatten up Americans. It has no nutritional value, is full of fat, sodium, and nitrates, and is a pathetic type of consumable made from the noblest of creatures.
Andy Rooney
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Have you noticed that they put advertisements in with your bills now? Like bills aren't distasteful enough, they have to stuff junk mail in there with them. I get back at them. I put garbage in with my check when I mail it in. Coffee grinds, banana peels...I write, Could you throw this away for me?
Andy Rooney
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We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't smart for them to continue waiting all their lives for him to come down the chimney with something wonderful. Santa Claus and God are cousins.
Andy Rooney
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I did not believe in the war. I thought it was wrong to go into any war. And I got to the war, and saw the Germans, and I changed my mind. I decided we were right going into World War II.
Andy Rooney
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We're all torn between the desire for privacy and the fear of lonliness. We need each other and we need to get away from each other. We need proximity and distance, conversation and silence. We almost always get more of each than we want at any one time.
Andy Rooney
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Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
Andy Rooney
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In spite of some bad experiences, I'm a firm believer in the trial and error method of learning.
Andy Rooney
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The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
Andy Rooney
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Soap, like people, shouldn't smell like anything.
Andy Rooney
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Women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!
Andy Rooney
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We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers. More college graduates ought to become plumbers or electricians, then go home at night and read Shakespeare.
Andy Rooney
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One day about 10 years ago the door to my office opened and who walked in but Bill Gates.... Seemed like a nice guy and has done more with his money than most billionaires. But that's as far as I want to go being kind to Bill Gates.
Andy Rooney
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Creativity is a by-product of hard work. If I never have another really new idea, it won't matter.
Andy Rooney
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I know a lot of you believe that most people in the news business are liberal. Let me tell you, I know a lot of them, and they were almost evenly divided this time. Half of them liked Senator Kerry the other half hated President Bush.
Andy Rooney
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It's ridiculous for a country to get all worked up about a game—except the Super Bowl, of course. Now that's important.
Andy Rooney
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I've learned... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
Andy Rooney