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A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, What are you thinking?. She doesn't care what you think.
Andy Rooney
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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Night
Care
Never
Think
Wake
Thinking
Middle
Asks
Woman
Doesn
More quotes by Andy Rooney
I often pass a farm with cows grazing in the field and I think to myself how terrible it is that human beings grow other animals just to kill them and eat them. Most of us think of vegetarians as nuts and I'm not a vegetarian but I wouldn't be surprised if we came to a time in 50 or 100 years when civilized people everywhere refused to eat animals.
Andy Rooney
As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book.
Andy Rooney
In Washington, a confidential assistant is someone who, if you don't want to know something, you go and ask him and he won't tell you.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.
Andy Rooney
I obviously have a knack for getting on paper what a lot of people have thought and didn't realize they thought. And they say, 'Hey, yeah!' And they like that.
Andy Rooney
Conservatives are more religious than liberals--although there is no evidence that they're nicer people because of it.
Andy Rooney
My wife uses fabric softener. I never knew what that stuff was for. Then I noticed women coming up to me, sniffing, then saying under their breath, Married! and walking away. Fabric Softeners are how our wives mark their territory. We can take off the ring, but it's hard to get that April fresh scent out of your clothes.
Andy Rooney
I hate to say it, but I had a great time in World War II.
Andy Rooney
I just wish this social institution [religion] wasnt based on what appears to me to be a monumental hoax built on an accumulation of customs and myths directed toward proving something that isnt true.
Andy Rooney
Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
Andy Rooney
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
Andy Rooney
Looking and not finding is certainly one of the most frustrating ways to spend time.
Andy Rooney
I'm in a position of feeling secure enough so that I can say what I think is right and if so many people think it's wrong that I get fired, well, I've got enough to eat.
Andy Rooney
A cat's idea of a 'good time' is to kill something.
Andy Rooney
My mother always called me 'sturdy' and said I have big bones. A little fat is what I am.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That money doesn't buy class.
Andy Rooney
Christians talk as though goodness was their idea but good behavior doesn't have any religious origin. Our prisons are filled with the devout.
Andy Rooney
Did you ever notice that people who are good with a computer don't use it for much of anything except being good with a computer? They know all about information technology, but they don't have much interest in the information. I'm the opposite.
Andy Rooney
There is obviously a great human need for religion because life seems to be such a mystery.
Andy Rooney