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I just wish this social institution [religion] wasnt based on what appears to me to be a monumental hoax built on an accumulation of customs and myths directed toward proving something that isnt true.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Social
Myth
Proving
True
Institutions
Myths
Something
Based
Accumulation
Toward
Institution
Prove
Directed
Built
Customs
Hoax
Religion
Appears
Hoaxes
Wish
Atheist
Monumental

More quotes by Andy Rooney

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Death is a distant rumor to the young.
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Democrats believe people are basically good but must be saved from themselves by the government. Republicans believe people are basically bad but they'll be okay if they're left alone.
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Obscenities... I think a lot of dumb people do it because they can't think of what they want to say and they're frustrated. A lot of smart people do it to pretend they aren't very smart - want to be just one of the boys.
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I often pass a farm with cows grazing in the field and I think to myself how terrible it is that human beings grow other animals just to kill them and eat them. Most of us think of vegetarians as nuts and I'm not a vegetarian but I wouldn't be surprised if we came to a time in 50 or 100 years when civilized people everywhere refused to eat animals.
Andy Rooney
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I am not retiring. Writers don't retire. Writers never stop writing.
Andy Rooney
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American closets are filled with once-worn clothes that got a bad review from a friend on their first appearance.
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The teacher who knows the most about a subject isn't necessarily the one who can teach it best.
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Don't you hate it when...your suitcase is the last one off the airplane?
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Those of us who don't have a party affiliation ought to be able to register under the heading Confused.
Andy Rooney
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The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned how to cook.
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I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
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Last night we had three small zucchini for dinner that were grown within fifty feet of our back door. I estimate they cost somewhere in the neighborhood of $371.49 each.
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I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldn't surprise me if they were out to sell me something or help someone else sell me something. I mean, why else would the Census Bureau want to know my telephone number?
Andy Rooney
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It's not so much that I write well, I just don't write badly very often and that passes for good on television.
Andy Rooney
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Small daily happenings make life spectacular.... start enjoying the small things in life!
Andy Rooney
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Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.
Andy Rooney
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I've learned that under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
Andy Rooney
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I think Dan [Rather] is transparently liberal. Now he may not like to hear me say that. I always agree with him, too. But I think he should be more careful.
Andy Rooney
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The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
Andy Rooney
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It isn't working that's so hard, it's getting ready to work.
Andy Rooney