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If I'd known how many problems I was going to run into before I finished, I can't remember a single project I would have started.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Remember
Project
Problem
Finished
Many
Projects
Going
Problems
Would
Single
Started
Known
Running
Wrestling

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I had one typewriter for 50 years, but I have bought seven computers in six years. I suppose that's why Bill Gates is rich, and Underwood is out of business.
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I can't choose how i feel. But i can choose what I do about it.
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I've learned... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.
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The average bright young man who is drafted hates the whole business because an army always tries to eliminate the individual differences in men.
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The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
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Have you noticed that they put advertisements in with your bills now? Like bills aren't distasteful enough, they have to stuff junk mail in there with them. I get back at them. I put garbage in with my check when I mail it in. Coffee grinds, banana peels...I write, Could you throw this away for me?
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Numbers tend to give the impression that there's more order in the world than there is.
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The best Christmas trees come very close to exceeding nature. If some of our great decorated trees had been grown in a remote forest area with lights that came on every evening as it grew dark, the whole world would come to look at them and marvel at the mystery of their great beauty.
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No matter what any of the grammar teachers say, punctuation is an arbitrary matter. It should be used to make sentences clear.
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Those of us who don't have a party affiliation ought to be able to register under the heading Confused.
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Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
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The best thing about a vacation is planning it.
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I'm in a position of feeling secure enough so that I can say what I think is right and if so many people think it's wrong that I get fired, well, I've got enough to eat.
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I didn't get old on purpose, it just happened. If you're lucky, it could happen to you.
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If you put on an item of clothing that hurts just because you have an idea it looks better or conforms to what other people are wearing, it's dumb.
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It's ridiculous for a country to get all worked up about a game—except the Super Bowl, of course. Now that's important.
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The fastest thing computers do is go obsolete.
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It's not so much that I write well, I just don't write badly very often and that passes for good on television.
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If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
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I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldn't surprise me if they were out to sell me something or help someone else sell me something. I mean, why else would the Census Bureau want to know my telephone number?
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