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Half the cookbooks tell you how to cook the food and the other half tell you how to avoid eating it.
Andy Rooney
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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Half
Cookbook
Tell
Culinary
Cook
Cooks
Cooking
Avoid
Eating
Food
More quotes by Andy Rooney
Before a kid learns how to use a computer that can solve mathematical problems, he or she should know how to do arithmetic without a computer.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That love, not time, heals all wounds.
Andy Rooney
Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.
Andy Rooney
I understand shipping - you have to expect to pay for the stamps or for the freight company - but what's this handling they always have? How much does handling cost, anyway? I don't want a lot of people handling something I'm going to buy before I get it. How much would it cost if you didn't handle it before you sent it to me?
Andy Rooney
Numbers tend to give the impression that there's more order in the world than there is.
Andy Rooney
We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't smart for them to continue waiting all their lives for him to come down the chimney with something wonderful. Santa Claus and God are cousins.
Andy Rooney
When it comes to educating all of us about the most basic things in life, it seems to me we need more kindergartens and fewer graduate schools.
Andy Rooney
The federal government has sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you can't eat it. We should make every effort to make sure this disease, often referred to as 'progress', doesn't spread.
Andy Rooney
American closets are filled with once-worn clothes that got a bad review from a friend on their first appearance.
Andy Rooney
Every one starts out being an atheist.
Andy Rooney
It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
Andy Rooney
I hate to say it, but I had a great time in World War II.
Andy Rooney
I am not retiring. Writers don't retire. Writers never stop writing.
Andy Rooney
Person-to-person, most people are honest.
Andy Rooney
The best thing about a vacation is planning it.
Andy Rooney
The only thing that really bugs me about television's coverage is those damn women they have down on the sidelines who don't know what the hell they're talking about. I mean, I'm not a sexist person, but a woman has no business being down there trying to make some comment about a football game.
Andy Rooney
All economists should be locked up until they admit that they don't know what they're talking about.
Andy Rooney
I like ice hockey, but it's a frustrating game to watch. It's hard to keep your eyes on both the puck and the players and too much time passes between scoring in hockey. There are usually more fights than there are points.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.
Andy Rooney
