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The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it!

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Two
Prepare
Cookbook
Book
Biggest
Bookstore
Exercise
Dieting
Humor
Sellers
Food
Bookstores
Books
Fitness
Funny
Diet
Tell
Diets

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I've learned... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.
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Art is a by-product of an honest and successful attempt to do something well.
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I've learned... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.
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Nothing in fine print is ever good news.
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The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
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The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.
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The last birthday that's any good is 23.
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In the United States alone, we spend seven times as much on war as on education. There's something wrong there. On this Memorial Day, we should certainly honor those who have died at war, but we should dedicate this day, not so much to their memory, but to the search for a way to end the idiocy of the wars that killed them.
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I've learned... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.
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Numbers tend to give the impression that there's more order in the world than there is.
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Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch.
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I am interested in details. If you go into anything far enough, you get into the details of it, and people turn out to be interested in what makes things work.
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By the time they're ready to be thrown away, most shoes are thoroughly comfortable
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It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.
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Figure skating is an unlikely Olympic event but its good television. It's sort of a combination of gymnastics and ballet. A little sexy too which doesn't hurt.
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I spent my first 50 years trying to become known as a writer and the next 30 trying to avoid being famous. I walk down the street or go to a football game and people shout, 'Hey Andy'. I hate that.
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Taxes are important. President Bush's tax proposals leave no rich person behind. Voters approve of President Bush helping the kind of people they wish they were one of.
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We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't smart for them to continue waiting all their lives for him to come down the chimney with something wonderful. Santa Claus and God are cousins.
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People like to say, You're only as old as you feel, but it isn't true. It's just something old people say to make themselves feel good about their age. You're as old as you are.
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The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
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