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I am not retiring. Writers don't retire. Writers never stop writing.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Writing
Never
Retire
Retiring
Writers
Stop

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Numbers are the most certain things we have.
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There are sixteen cans of coffee here together they hold a total of thirteen and a half pounds of coffee. Doesn't that seem like cheating?
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There are more beauty parlors than there are beauties.
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I've learned .... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.
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I've learned .... That opportunities are never lost someone will take the ones you miss.
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I've learned... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.
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I don't like food that's too carefully arranged it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting.
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If you do see me in a restaurant, please, just let me eat my dinner.
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Soap, like people, shouldn't smell like anything.
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My own time is passing fast enough without some national game to help it along.
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Phyllis Schlafly speaks for all American women who oppose equal rights for themselves.
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When there are starving people in the world, it seems wrong that so many of us Americans eat as much for entertainment as for nourishment.
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Everyone hates war, everyone says.
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Writers don't often say anything that readers don't already know, unless its a news story. A writer's greatest pleasure is revealing to people things they knew but did not know they knew. Or did not realize everyone else knew, too. This produces a warm sense of fellow feeling and is the best a writer can do.
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We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers.
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We're all torn between the desire for privacy and the fear of lonliness. We need each other and we need to get away from each other. We need proximity and distance, conversation and silence. We almost always get more of each than we want at any one time.
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The fastest thing computers do is go obsolete.
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For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 40 +, there is a balding, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.
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A cat's idea of a 'good time' is to kill something.
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The world must be filled with unsuccessful musical careers like mine, and it's probably a good thing. We don't need a lot of bad musicians filling the air with unnecessary sounds. Some of the professionals are bad enough.
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