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I've learned .... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Happiness
Dock
Docks
Harbor
Harbors
Bitterness
Elsewhere
Learned

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I've learned... That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.
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I had one typewriter for 50 years, but I have bought seven computers in six years. I suppose that's why Bill Gates is rich, and Underwood is out of business.
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Numbers tend to give the impression that there's more order in the world than there is.
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I try to look nice. I comb my hair, I tie my tie, I put on a jacket, but I draw the line when it comes to trimming my eyebrows. You work with what you got.
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I'm always on the lookout for something good about people. Often months go by.
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I've done a lot of complaining here, but of all the things I've complained about, I can't complain about my life.
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In Washington, a confidential assistant is someone who, if you don't want to know something, you go and ask him and he won't tell you.
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I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran.
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People waiting for an elevator don't know what to do, standing with strangers. There is nothing to do. Its an uneasy time. Some press the button repeatedly as though it would help.
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People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.
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As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book.
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It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.
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Nothing in fine print is ever good news.
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One of my major shortcomings - I'm vindictive. I don't know why that is. Even in petty things in my life I tend to strike back. It's a lot more pleasurable a sensation than feeling threatened.
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We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers. More college graduates ought to become plumbers or electricians, then go home at night and read Shakespeare.
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No one ever writes a book in which he is the bad guy.
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... all of us talk faster than we listen.
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If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
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Death is a distant rumor to the young.
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Civilization means conforming to a standard of behavior that may not seem natural to us.
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