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I didn't get old on purpose, it just happened. If you're lucky, it could happen to you.
Andy Rooney
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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Purpose
Didn
Happens
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More quotes by Andy Rooney
I don't differentiate much, except in degree, between people who believe in religion from those who believe in astrology, magic or the supernatural.
Andy Rooney
One day about 10 years ago the door to my office opened and who walked in but Bill Gates.... Seemed like a nice guy and has done more with his money than most billionaires. But that's as far as I want to go being kind to Bill Gates.
Andy Rooney
Writers don't often say anything that readers don't already know, unless its a news story. A writer's greatest pleasure is revealing to people things they knew but did not know they knew. Or did not realize everyone else knew, too. This produces a warm sense of fellow feeling and is the best a writer can do.
Andy Rooney
The federal government has sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you can't eat it. We should make every effort to make sure this disease, often referred to as 'progress', doesn't spread.
Andy Rooney
One of the things we can be sure of over the July 4th weekend is that news reports will keep telling us how many of us are going to die in automobile accidents.
Andy Rooney
Ugly is very popular this year...I had a feeling these clothes were deigned by someone who didn't like women.
Andy Rooney
Space, like Switzerland, should be neutral.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.
Andy Rooney
We've sent a man to the moon and that's 29,000 miles away. The center of the Earth is only 4,000 miles away. You could drive that in a week but for some reason nobody's ever done it.
Andy Rooney
I'd like to take some calculus, too. I have absolutely no ability in that direction and not much interest, either, but there's something going on in mathematics that I don't understand, and I'd like to find out what it is.
Andy Rooney
As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book.
Andy Rooney
If I'd known how many problems I was going to run into before I finished, I can't remember a single project I would have started.
Andy Rooney
Numbers are the most certain things we have.
Andy Rooney
Figure skating is an unlikely Olympic event but its good television. It's sort of a combination of gymnastics and ballet. A little sexy too which doesn't hurt.
Andy Rooney
The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it!
Andy Rooney
The closing of a door can bring blessed privacy and comfort - the opening, terror. Conversely, the closing of a door can be a sad and final thing - the opening a wonderfully joyous moment.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That when you're in love, it shows.
Andy Rooney
We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't smart for them to continue waiting all their lives for him to come down the chimney with something wonderful. Santa Claus and God are cousins.
Andy Rooney
I've learned... That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away.
Andy Rooney
Those of us who don't have a party affiliation ought to be able to register under the heading Confused.
Andy Rooney