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Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Happiness
Happy
Happens
Life
Strikes
Depends

More quotes by Andy Rooney

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Most of us aren't that interested in getting rich- we just don't want to get poor.
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Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, How can he want me the way I look in the morning? It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.
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Women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!
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I've learned... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
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In Washington, a confidential assistant is someone who, if you don't want to know something, you go and ask him and he won't tell you.
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Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
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I never understood retirement. What is the attraction of retirement? I go down there to Florida and look around and I said, my God, who wants this? Not me.
Andy Rooney
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Computers may save time but they sure waste a lot of paper. About 98 percent of everything printed out by a computer is garbage that no one ever reads.
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I like Valentine's Day. The trouble is the florists and the candy-makers and the card people are all advertising so much, you don't dare let the day go by without making an offering, whether you mean it or not. Money exceeds affection.
Andy Rooney
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Writers don't retire. I will always be a writer.
Andy Rooney
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Phyllis Schlafly speaks for all American women who oppose equal rights for themselves.
Andy Rooney
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I've learned... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.
Andy Rooney
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Age is nothing but experience, and some of us are more experienced than others
Andy Rooney
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I've learned... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.
Andy Rooney
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Don't keep saying, I don't know where the time goes. It goes the same place it's always gone and no one has ever known where that is.
Andy Rooney
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Not many people in this world are as lucky as I've been. ... All this time I've been paid to say what is on my mind on television. You don't get any luckier in life than that.
Andy Rooney
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I've learned .... That opportunities are never lost someone will take the ones you miss.
Andy Rooney
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The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned how to cook.
Andy Rooney
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We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't smart for them to continue waiting all their lives for him to come down the chimney with something wonderful. Santa Claus and God are cousins.
Andy Rooney
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When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper.
Andy Rooney