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If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
Andy Rooney
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Andy Rooney
Age: 92 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 14
Died: 2011
Died: November 4
Journalist
Screenwriter
War Correspondent
Writer
Albany
New York
Andrew Aitken Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken Rooney
Really
Smile
Love
Laughing
Joy
Happiness
Happy
Smiley
Else
Frowning
Around
Positivity
Mean
Laughter
More quotes by Andy Rooney
I just wish this social institution [religion] wasnt based on what appears to me to be a monumental hoax built on an accumulation of customs and myths directed toward proving something that isnt true.
Andy Rooney
I'd be more willing to accept religion, even if I didn't believe it, if I thought it made people nicer to each other but I don't think it does.
Andy Rooney
I dislike loud-mouthed patriots who suggest they like our country more than I do. Some people's idea of patriotism is hating other countries.
Andy Rooney
There are sixteen cans of coffee here together they hold a total of thirteen and a half pounds of coffee. Doesn't that seem like cheating?
Andy Rooney
It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.
Andy Rooney
Obscenities... I think a lot of dumb people do it because they can't think of what they want to say and they're frustrated. A lot of smart people do it to pretend they aren't very smart - want to be just one of the boys.
Andy Rooney
We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers. More college graduates ought to become plumbers or electricians, then go home at night and read Shakespeare.
Andy Rooney
I never understood retirement. What is the attraction of retirement? I go down there to Florida and look around and I said, my God, who wants this? Not me.
Andy Rooney
I've learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
Andy Rooney
I'm in a position of feeling secure enough so that I can say what I think is right and if so many people think it's wrong that I get fired, well, I've got enough to eat.
Andy Rooney
In a conversation, keep in mind that you're more interested in what you have to say than anyone else is.
Andy Rooney
In the futile attempts we all make to tidy up our lives and our surroundings, nothing is more difficult than throwing out a book.
Andy Rooney
Computers may save time but they sure waste a lot of paper. About 98 percent of everything printed out by a computer is garbage that no one ever reads.
Andy Rooney
One of my major shortcomings - I'm vindictive. I don't know why that is. Even in petty things in my life I tend to strike back. It's a lot more pleasurable a sensation than feeling threatened.
Andy Rooney
Nothing in fine print is ever good news.
Andy Rooney
I don't know anything offhand that mystifies Americans more than the cotton they put in pill bottles. Why do they do it? Are you supposed to put the cotton back in once you've taken a pill out?
Andy Rooney
Once you pass forty, a dime isn't worth bending over to pick up if you drop one.
Andy Rooney
We can all be prouder to be human beings, because that's what they were. They make up for a lot of liars, cheats, and terrorists among us.
Andy Rooney
I am not retiring. Writers don't retire. Writers never stop writing.
Andy Rooney
It's not so much that I write well, I just don't write badly very often and that passes for good on television.
Andy Rooney