Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Dave Rath is recovering. A month ago he had hip pocket replacement surgery.
Andy Kindler
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Andy Kindler
Age: 24
Born: 2000
Born: January 1
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
New York City
New York
Hips
Replacement
Months
Replacements
Recovering
Dave
Pocket
Surgery
Pockets
Month
More quotes by Andy Kindler
I noticed when I was driving around that they changed the name of the Interborough Parkway to the Jackie Robinson Parkway. And the Interborough family is very upset about this.
Andy Kindler
Kevin James is going to do a couple of specials. One's called It's Getting Muggy In Here.
Andy Kindler
I don't remember much about my bar mitzvah. The only thing I remember - I killed! That's what I remembered. Nobody could follow me at my bar-mitzvah. It was over when I was done.
Andy Kindler
Now we have two choices in life: have sex with the same person forever or risk a terminal disease. Either way, your life is over.
Andy Kindler
I'm on a show called Wizards of Wavery Place, and I like it, but I'm unable to convince my Tivo that I wouldn't also like iCarly.
Andy Kindler
I believe at the end of my career I'll be retired into the recurring character hall of fame.
Andy Kindler
Tracy Morgan apologizes for his homophobic rant, still no apologies for the sketch about the guy living under the street.
Andy Kindler
CNN has a thing called You Choose the News. Y'know what CNN? I'm turning you on because I don't know the news. I was hoping you could help me.
Andy Kindler
Some of my inventions didn't take off. I invented a url lengthener.
Andy Kindler
George Lopez does so much mugging, I'm surprised he's not up on charges.
Andy Kindler
BJ Novak gets the Perseverance Award for graduating from Harvard and being unemployed for the entire plane ride to Los Angeles.
Andy Kindler
My friend taught me this one. You take the heel of your hand, you can shove someone's nose right through their brain. I can't even watch someone blow their nose. If I'm in a fight, I'm not gonna be shoving or poking, I'm gonna be running or begging - that's my two choices, right there.
Andy Kindler
I do have insecurities. I don't know if you can tell. I'm not brimming with confidence.
Andy Kindler
Once when Larry the Cable Guy was on Conan's show, Conan O'Brien was so offended by Larry's material, he had to walk away from the desk he was so offended.
Andy Kindler
I don't know if it's the weather or what's going on - the summer or something like that - but recently I've been feeling extremely bisexual. I don't know what it is. I don't know what's going on, but I walked down the street and, suddenly, the ladies are looking awfully good to me.
Andy Kindler
There's a lot of controversy online, some people say i'm a genius and other say i'm hugely talented.
Andy Kindler
The saddest day in Pixar history was when some guy said 'get Larry the Cable Guy on the phone.
Andy Kindler
I have no sympathy for the people who went to Charlie Sheen's show and were disappointed. That didn't seem very organized! That guy's all over the map!
Andy Kindler
George Lopez has to get a physical comedy checkup every year to make sure his bulging eyes don't get out of control... Good news George... you are humor free! There's no sign of comedy anywhere in your blood stream.
Andy Kindler
I don't really know what's wrong with Jay Leno. I don't have the training to make a professional diagnosis.
Andy Kindler
