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Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.

Andy Borowitz

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Andy Borowitz
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 4
Author
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Writer
Shaker Heights
Ohio
People
Thanks
Evidence
Internet
Technology
Funny
Ample
Give
Suspected
Might
Idiots
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Idiot

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The Republicans suddenly are very concerned about people losing their health coverage! I would believe that they were worried about our well-being if a) they didn't cut food stamps and b) they didn't oppose every law regulating guns.
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The only way to explain how some people dress for the airport is they think no one else will be there.
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Thanks to Facebook, I never forget the birthdays of people I don't really know.
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It only cost Mitt Romney $76.6 million to defeat a serial adulterer and a mental patient in a sweater vest.
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Remember, no matter how hard your life is right now, it would be worse if a song by Chicago was playing.
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The separation of church and state has been a cornerstone of American democracy for over two hundred years. Getting rid of it was long overdue.
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Twitter is currently valued at $8 billion, or $1 for every hour it has wasted.
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Ann Romney: 'The hardest part of being a stay at home mom was deciding which of our homes to stay at.'
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It used to be that people could be painfully boring in private. Facebook changed all that.
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US Airways made an $8 billion bid for Delta, including $4 billion in cash and $4 billion in lost luggage.
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If you are friends with the wrong people, Google+ autocorrects them
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Now that we all agree contraception is a bad idea, let's take a harder look at electricity and soap.
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Weirdly, the people complaining about the healthcare website not working after three weeks were quiet about the Iraq war not working after eight years.
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Cars will soon have the Internet on the dashboard. I worry that this will distract me from my texting.
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The hardest thing about life is that every now and then you have to do things so you have something to tweet about.
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Every week Republicans are excited about a new candidate because the one they liked last week turned out to be a moron.
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I make the modest proposal that psychiatric care should be as easy to get as bullets at Wal-Mart.
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Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Give a man Twitter, and he will forget to eat and starve to death.
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If its platform is any guide, the Republican party is staunchly pro-life until you are actually born.
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Next time someone says, 'Where has big government ever gotten us?' the correct answer is 'Mars.'
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