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Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.

Andy Borowitz

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Andy Borowitz
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 4
Author
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Writer
Shaker Heights
Ohio
Internet
Technology
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White House political adviser Karl Rove was one of Robert Novak's sources for the 2003 disclosure of a CIA operative's identity, according to a story published today in Duh magazine.
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Thanks to Facebook, I never forget the birthdays of people I don't really know.
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As we go from Abraham Lincoln to Theodore Roosevelt to Mitt Romney, I now understand why the Republicans don't believe in evolution.
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Didn't we settle contraception & affirmative action? If the GOP keep going backwards they'll soon be debating slavery.
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Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.
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Twitter is currently valued at $8 billion, or $1 for every hour it has wasted.
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The baby Jesus was the last homeless person the Republicans liked.
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Other countries care for their mentally ill. Making them debate on TV is just cruel.
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Let's withdraw from Afghanistan and have the army invade America - that's the only way we'll get new schools and roads.
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Xmas Trivia: Before it became a major shopping holiday, Christmas is believed to have had a religious meaning.
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Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Give a man Twitter, and he will forget to eat and starve to death.
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The Republicans suddenly are very concerned about people losing their health coverage! I would believe that they were worried about our well-being if a) they didn't cut food stamps and b) they didn't oppose every law regulating guns.
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If its platform is any guide, the Republican party is staunchly pro-life until you are actually born.
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All Americans mourn the passing of the author of the Declaration of Independence, George Jefferson.
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Rick Perry is qualified to be President in the same way that Olive Garden is qualified to be Italy.
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Now that we all agree contraception is a bad idea, let's take a harder look at electricity and soap.
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It used to be that people could be painfully boring in private. Facebook changed all that.
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If you are friends with the wrong people, Google+ autocorrects them
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Christmas never would have caught on if it had been called Celebrate a Little Jew's Birthday.
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The real news has gotten more surreal and absurd, and my fake news, if you want to call it that, has gotten more plausible. And at some point, those two trend lines crossed.
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