Quote

Weirdly, the people complaining about the healthcare website not working after three weeks were quiet about the Iraq war not working after eight years.

Andy Borowitz

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Andy Borowitz
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 4
Author
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Writer
Shaker Heights
Ohio
Quiet
Week
Working
Weirdly
War
Healthcare
Three
Weeks
Years
Complaining
People
Eight
Iraq

More quotes by Andy Borowitz

Image
Thanks to Facebook, I never forget the birthdays of people I don't really know.
Andy Borowitz
Image
A Romney presidency will be awesome unless you're poor, sick, gay, female, Mexican or a dog.
Andy Borowitz
Image
The only way to explain how some people dress for the airport is they think no one else will be there.
Andy Borowitz
Image
Michele Bachmann says God made the earthquake and hurricane to punish us. Untrue - he made Michele Bachmann for that.
Andy Borowitz
Image
You can return all the Christmas gifts you want, but you will never get back the time spent with your relatives.
Andy Borowitz
Image
I make the modest proposal that psychiatric care should be as easy to get as bullets at Wal-Mart.
Andy Borowitz
Image
Twitter is currently valued at $8 billion, or $1 for every hour it has wasted.
Andy Borowitz
Image
A race between Perry and Christie would test whether Americans would rather be executed or eaten.
Andy Borowitz
Image
Xmas Trivia: Before it became a major shopping holiday, Christmas is believed to have had a religious meaning.
Andy Borowitz
Image
Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.
Andy Borowitz
Image
Facebook's new relationship status option: No longer able to interact with actual people
Andy Borowitz
Image
Welcome delegates to the 2012 Republican Convention! Remember to set your watches back 400 years.
Andy Borowitz
Image
It only cost Mitt Romney $76.6 million to defeat a serial adulterer and a mental patient in a sweater vest.
Andy Borowitz
Image
The hardest thing about life is that every now and then you have to do things so you have something to tweet about.
Andy Borowitz
Image
US Airways made an $8 billion bid for Delta, including $4 billion in cash and $4 billion in lost luggage.
Andy Borowitz
Image
We invaded Afghanistan to find bin Laden. We found him in Pakistan, and we're still in Afghanistan. We need better GPS.
Andy Borowitz
Image
All Americans mourn the passing of the author of the Declaration of Independence, George Jefferson.
Andy Borowitz
Image
I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one.
Andy Borowitz
Image
As popular as Christmas is, it would be even bigger if it had vampires.
Andy Borowitz
Image
As we go from Abraham Lincoln to Theodore Roosevelt to Mitt Romney, I now understand why the Republicans don't believe in evolution.
Andy Borowitz