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A race between Perry and Christie would test whether Americans would rather be executed or eaten.
Andy Borowitz
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Andy Borowitz
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 4
Author
Comedian
Journalist
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Shaker Heights
Ohio
Whether
Christie
Would
Executed
Eaten
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Tests
Americans
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Rather
Perry
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The hardest thing about life is that every now and then you have to do things so you have something to tweet about.
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US Airways made an $8 billion bid for Delta, including $4 billion in cash and $4 billion in lost luggage.
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Every week Republicans are excited about a new candidate because the one they liked last week turned out to be a moron.
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White House political adviser Karl Rove was one of Robert Novak's sources for the 2003 disclosure of a CIA operative's identity, according to a story published today in Duh magazine.
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Didn't we settle contraception & affirmative action? If the GOP keep going backwards they'll soon be debating slavery.
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Call me a dreamer, but I think it would be great if getting medical attention were as easy as getting a gun.
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I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one.
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Congress is furious at the Secret Service for consorting with hookers, which has traditionally been Congress's role.
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Michele Bachmann says God made the earthquake and hurricane to punish us. Untrue - he made Michele Bachmann for that.
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I make the modest proposal that psychiatric care should be as easy to get as bullets at Wal-Mart.
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John Edwards is a tragic case of a man who ran for President when he should have joined the Secret Service.
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