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NHPrimary Trivia: The Republican candidates have not spoken to a black person since Herman Cain dropped out.

Andy Borowitz

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Andy Borowitz
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 4
Author
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Writer
Shaker Heights
Ohio
Trivia
Persons
Cain
Person
Dropped
Spoken
Candidates
Republican
Since
Herman
Black

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Thanks to Facebook, I never forget the birthdays of people I don't really know.
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Didn't we settle contraception & affirmative action? If the GOP keep going backwards they'll soon be debating slavery.
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Next time someone says, 'Where has big government ever gotten us?' the correct answer is 'Mars.'
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If its platform is any guide, the Republican party is staunchly pro-life until you are actually born.
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We invaded Afghanistan to find bin Laden. We found him in Pakistan, and we're still in Afghanistan. We need better GPS.
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Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.
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You can return all the Christmas gifts you want, but you will never get back the time spent with your relatives.
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Xmas Trivia: Before it became a major shopping holiday, Christmas is believed to have had a religious meaning.
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The Republicans suddenly are very concerned about people losing their health coverage! I would believe that they were worried about our well-being if a) they didn't cut food stamps and b) they didn't oppose every law regulating guns.
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As popular as Christmas is, it would be even bigger if it had vampires.
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If Mark Twain had had Twitter, he would have been amazing at it. But he probably wouldn't have gotten around to writing Huckleberry Finn.
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On July 4 we celebrate government of the people, by the people, and for the people, or as they are now called, corporations.
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Sarah Palin has decided not to run for President and go straight to the quitting part.
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US Airways made an $8 billion bid for Delta, including $4 billion in cash and $4 billion in lost luggage.
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Maybe I'm a dreamer, but I wish mental health care was as easy to get as, say, a gun.
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Weirdly, the people complaining about the healthcare website not working after three weeks were quiet about the Iraq war not working after eight years.
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Maybe this is crazy, but I think the right to own a gun is trumped by the right not to be shot by one.
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I make the modest proposal that psychiatric care should be as easy to get as bullets at Wal-Mart.
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