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Xmas Trivia: Before it became a major shopping holiday, Christmas is believed to have had a religious meaning.

Andy Borowitz

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Andy Borowitz
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 4
Author
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Writer
Shaker Heights
Ohio
Became
Humorists
Meaning
Shopping
Religious
Holiday
Funny
Comedian
Christmas
Believed
Majors
Xmas
Major
Trivia

More quotes by Andy Borowitz

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Let's withdraw from Afghanistan and have the army invade America - that's the only way we'll get new schools and roads.
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Maybe I'm a dreamer, but I wish mental health care was as easy to get as, say, a gun.
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Cars will soon have the Internet on the dashboard. I worry that this will distract me from my texting.
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Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.
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A race between Perry and Christie would test whether Americans would rather be executed or eaten.
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Ann Romney: 'The hardest part of being a stay at home mom was deciding which of our homes to stay at.'
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The only way to explain how some people dress for the airport is they think no one else will be there.
Andy Borowitz
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I make the modest proposal that psychiatric care should be as easy to get as bullets at Wal-Mart.
Andy Borowitz
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It used to be that people could be painfully boring in private. Facebook changed all that.
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As popular as Christmas is, it would be even bigger if it had vampires.
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A Romney presidency will be awesome unless you're poor, sick, gay, female, Mexican or a dog.
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Sarah Palin has decided not to run for President and go straight to the quitting part.
Andy Borowitz
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Next time someone says, 'Where has big government ever gotten us?' the correct answer is 'Mars.'
Andy Borowitz
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On July 4 we celebrate government of the people, by the people, and for the people, or as they are now called, corporations.
Andy Borowitz
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As we go from Abraham Lincoln to Theodore Roosevelt to Mitt Romney, I now understand why the Republicans don't believe in evolution.
Andy Borowitz
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Michele Bachmann says God made the earthquake and hurricane to punish us. Untrue - he made Michele Bachmann for that.
Andy Borowitz
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Christmas never would have caught on if it had been called Celebrate a Little Jew's Birthday.
Andy Borowitz
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I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one.
Andy Borowitz
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NHPrimary Trivia: The Republican candidates have not spoken to a black person since Herman Cain dropped out.
Andy Borowitz
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The baby Jesus was the last homeless person the Republicans liked.
Andy Borowitz