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A lot of people are very political when they are young, and then they outgrow it.
Andrew Solomon
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Andrew Solomon
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: October 30
Author
Clinical Psychologist
Journalist
Novelist
Writer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Young
People
Outgrow
Political
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The idea of what it is like to lose everything is awful.
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It is easy to keep secrets by being honest in an ironic tone of voice.
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You need to take the traumas and make them part of who you've come to be, and you need to fold the worst events of your life into a narrative of triumph, evincing a better self in response to things that hurt.
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If some glorious angel suddenly descended through my living room ceiling and offered to take away the children I have and give me other, better children — more polite, funnier, nicer, smarter — I would cling to the children I have and pray away that atrocious spectacle.
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I believe very deeply that this beauty I call the soul is not a random occurrence. I don't know what its meaning is at some larger level, but I know that it has meaning.
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Psychologically, I will not have to seek far if I decide to kill myself, because in my mind and heart I am more ready for this than for the unplanned daily tribulations that mark off the mornings and afternoons.
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The tragedies that are being brought about vastly outweigh the benefits that are being achieved.
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I don't believe that there is anyone of faith whose faith would not be strengthened by those experiences of family.
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We live in the right time, even if it doesn't always feel like it.
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The more gay people can tell our stories, the more other people will accept gay people.
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The opposite of depression is not happiness, but vitality, and it was vitality that seemed to seep out of me.
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I look at the rates of suicide among gay teens. They are so, so high for suicide attempts and for completed suicides.
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I don't accept subtractive models of love, only additive ones. And I believe that in the same way we need species diversity to ensure that the planet can go on, so we need this diversity of affection and diversity of family in order to strengthen the ecosphere of kindness.
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I love to communicate, and I love music. That's why I always thought not being able to hear would be a tragedy.
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Being gay is immutable.
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I think an awful lot of the diplomatic problems that exist in the world come from people assuming that their society is the one with a purchase on truth.
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I did grow up in a household in which I felt that to be myself was to damage the people I loved.
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Any community that remains an abstraction is an easy target for prejudice and cruelty, but any community that becomes fully humanized is much harder to treat in that way.
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My parents deeply and truly loved each other, and if my mother hadn't died they would have been together forever. They were together for as much of forever as was given to them. They really loved my brother and me and were very good to us. It gave the model of how to have a happy marriage and family, but it also set the bar very high.
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In these xenophobic times, when politicians are stoking everyone's anxiety about threats from abroad, I would argue that engaging with the rest of the world is not only a luxury, in the way that travel is, but actually a moral responsibility.
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