Quote

If it smells like fish its a dish. If it smells like cologne leave it alone.

Andrew Dice Clay

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Andrew Dice Clay
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: September 29
Comedian
Film Actor
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Like
Dish
Smells
Dishes
Fish
Fishes
Smell
Leave
Alone
Cologne

More quotes by Andrew Dice Clay

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I’m a Brooklyn guy onstage, and I try to really feed my fans with the kind of material they expect from me.
Andrew Dice Clay
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Comics, a lot of them, are really depressed people, and I happen to be somebody that does have a lot of confidence. That's the odd thing about my stand-up. I am very confident. I always was.
Andrew Dice Clay
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There was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many kids... her uterus fell out!
Andrew Dice Clay
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When you jerk off, you're saying Hey, I care about me.
Andrew Dice Clay
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I'm not the greatest husband - I've got a girlfriend. It doesn't really please my wife, but then if I was looking to please her I wouldn't have a girlfriend. I mean she knows about it, and I guess she's okay with it. Plus my kids like both of them.
Andrew Dice Clay
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I always believed you could fix whatever problems.
Andrew Dice Clay
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Even as a stage performer, I have my garb which is leather jackets and black jeans to make me feel a certain way. The wardrobe is really important to feeling the character you're playing.
Andrew Dice Clay
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If you hide what you really are, then there's going to be problems in marriage down the road. I don't mind if a girl is aggressive. It's just sex.
Andrew Dice Clay
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I just love the whole art form of acting, of being in front of a camera and playing different things. Not that I would ever say I'm the greatest actor in the world, but I am capable of playing different kinds of roles that emotionally I could get into.
Andrew Dice Clay
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I make people laugh hard I'm a comic, that's just the way it is. And I make them laugh because I'm funny, not because I'm filthy. The subject matter is dirty, but the pictures I paint are really funny. A lot of comics don't understand that that's what it's about. It's just, I'll be dirty and they'll laugh. Nobody's becoming a superstar that wa
Andrew Dice Clay
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I never go see a comic. The only one I'd ever really want to see is Don Rickles. He might be 80 years old, but he blows everyone out of the water.
Andrew Dice Clay
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Little Boy Blue... he needed the money!
Andrew Dice Clay
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I might do cartoonish sexual jokes, but it's my way of saying what's going on in the world. How people are animals, really.
Andrew Dice Clay
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I always just loved women, but more important than loving women, more important than sexual stuff, is I always believed in romance.
Andrew Dice Clay
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Comics, as good as they might be, they didn't know much about performance. There aren't too many comics you could watch for an hour without getting tired. They might have good material, but it's about theater to me.
Andrew Dice Clay
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Women today are the biggest pigs today in history. They are just the dirtiest, nastiest slobs. I don't know how old your chick is, but the truth of the matter is they've become the aggressors. You know? They're upset if you're not balls deep in them by half way through the first date! They think you don't like them.
Andrew Dice Clay
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There are very few comics that understand about exciting the crowd, and that's what I always prided myself on: giving a more confident macho attitude towards delivering material.
Andrew Dice Clay
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Being onstage and performing, the high of that, and people coming to see you, and getting to make them laugh - that's what gets me hyped up. It's a nervous excitement.
Andrew Dice Clay
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I think the best part of being gay is when you're done [with sex], you could turn over and talk about football.
Andrew Dice Clay
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I like when something makes you think after you stop watching.
Andrew Dice Clay