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Whether you're gay, straight, you can't tell anybody who to love and who to marry. It's unconstitutional and it's morally wrong.
Andrew Dice Clay
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Andrew Dice Clay
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: September 29
Comedian
Film Actor
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Whether
Tell
Unconstitutional
Love
Morally
Marry
Gay
Straight
Anybody
Wrong
More quotes by Andrew Dice Clay
Women are now more aggressive than men! And I don't put them down for it. I think it's great. My attitude with sex with any woman I've ever been with is, I want you to be exactly who you want to be behind closed doors. Don't ever hold back with me.
Andrew Dice Clay
You gotta be happy when you wake up in the morning and look at what's next to ya. You wanna just hop on it again. That's how I feel. That's what life is about. Because when you leave the house, it's all misery anyway.
Andrew Dice Clay
I've been getting in trouble my whole life and I really don't care what anybody thinks of what I do on stage as a comic.
Andrew Dice Clay
I think that a lot of men, especially once they're married, feel like their girl is just who she is, so don't treat her too special. They shut her off, and having sex before you go to bed is like a sleeping pill. I always say, you're supposed to remember the reason you even asked that girl out.
Andrew Dice Clay
I want to be able to make people laugh as hard as they possibly can, and I really think they need that.
Andrew Dice Clay
I've always had my voice as a comic. I was never that into politics, or prop comedy.
Andrew Dice Clay
I might do cartoonish sexual jokes, but it's my way of saying what's going on in the world. How people are animals, really.
Andrew Dice Clay
As long as you can walk the street and you know there's a tomorrow, there's always that chance. That's how I've always been. I've always had complete belief that I would make something out of myself again, because to me, it's always been about accomplishment.
Andrew Dice Clay
I like real girls. When they're in bed with you, it's not a show. They just want to do that.
Andrew Dice Clay
Women today are the biggest pigs today in history. They are just the dirtiest, nastiest slobs. I don't know how old your chick is, but the truth of the matter is they've become the aggressors. You know? They're upset if you're not balls deep in them by half way through the first date! They think you don't like them.
Andrew Dice Clay
Anybody can go onstage and be dirty. You have to be funny, that's the key. You can say anything as long as it's funny. You can't take it too seriously up there. And people coming to see you can't take it too seriously.
Andrew Dice Clay
I just like to make people laugh.
Andrew Dice Clay
Life is like sex, baby - the more you put in, the more you get out. End of story.
Andrew Dice Clay
When I did a sitcom and played a postman, I was brought to tears playing that postman, because I felt like one. I didn't grow up even wanting to be a post man. Now, I understand the meaning of the term postal. I was bored to tears. And what was funny was that the producer actually looked like a bug.
Andrew Dice Clay
If it smells like fish its a dish. If it smells like cologne leave it alone.
Andrew Dice Clay
There are very few comics that understand about exciting the crowd, and that's what I always prided myself on: giving a more confident macho attitude towards delivering material.
Andrew Dice Clay
I'll always push myself because that's the journey of life. We do go through things. Some of it's incredibly great and some of it's really bad.
Andrew Dice Clay
There was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many kids... her uterus fell out!
Andrew Dice Clay
Little Boy Blue... he needed the money!
Andrew Dice Clay
I just love the whole art form of acting, of being in front of a camera and playing different things. Not that I would ever say I'm the greatest actor in the world, but I am capable of playing different kinds of roles that emotionally I could get into.
Andrew Dice Clay