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I like when something makes you think after you stop watching.
Andrew Dice Clay
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Andrew Dice Clay
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: September 29
Comedian
Film Actor
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Think
Thinking
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More quotes by Andrew Dice Clay
Women today are the biggest pigs today in history. They are just the dirtiest, nastiest slobs. I don't know how old your chick is, but the truth of the matter is they've become the aggressors. You know? They're upset if you're not balls deep in them by half way through the first date! They think you don't like them.
Andrew Dice Clay
I always believed you could fix whatever problems.
Andrew Dice Clay
As long as you can walk the street and you know there's a tomorrow, there's always that chance. That's how I've always been. I've always had complete belief that I would make something out of myself again, because to me, it's always been about accomplishment.
Andrew Dice Clay
If Lady Gaga didn't put on all those outfits, she probably wouldn't have made it in show business. She put a show behind her voice.
Andrew Dice Clay
If it smells like fish its a dish. If it smells like cologne leave it alone.
Andrew Dice Clay
Comics, a lot of them, are really depressed people, and I happen to be somebody that does have a lot of confidence. That's the odd thing about my stand-up. I am very confident. I always was.
Andrew Dice Clay
If you hide what you really are, then there's going to be problems in marriage down the road. I don't mind if a girl is aggressive. It's just sex.
Andrew Dice Clay
Anybody can go onstage and be dirty. You have to be funny, that's the key. You can say anything as long as it's funny. You can't take it too seriously up there. And people coming to see you can't take it too seriously.
Andrew Dice Clay
People have always been animals when it comes to sex. But since the Internet, it's become really out of control, in my opinion.
Andrew Dice Clay
Life is like sex, baby - the more you put in, the more you get out. End of story.
Andrew Dice Clay
Little Boy Blue... he needed the money!
Andrew Dice Clay
Women today leave the house in animal prints and six inch stilettos, what does that say? I'm going to church? They're saying I want you to hang me by my tits from your ceiling and bite my ass. You know what I mean? That's what it says to me anyway.
Andrew Dice Clay
Whether you're gay, straight, you can't tell anybody who to love and who to marry. It's unconstitutional and it's morally wrong.
Andrew Dice Clay
Women are now more aggressive than men! And I don't put them down for it. I think it's great. My attitude with sex with any woman I've ever been with is, I want you to be exactly who you want to be behind closed doors. Don't ever hold back with me.
Andrew Dice Clay
I'm an animal. I'm an animal in real-life and an animal onstage. I never became a recluse, I never lived up in the Hills where I didn't see real life. You know what I mean? I'm not still living in Brooklyn, but I'm still living in the street. I go out by myself, I don't go out with a million body guards, I run my own errands.
Andrew Dice Clay
I like real girls. When they're in bed with you, it's not a show. They just want to do that.
Andrew Dice Clay
I just like to make people laugh.
Andrew Dice Clay
I never became a recluse where I got away from people and who they are and how they think. I'm very much in touch with the world.
Andrew Dice Clay
I always just loved women, but more important than loving women, more important than sexual stuff, is I always believed in romance.
Andrew Dice Clay
I do whatever I do. I go to the club. I work on material. While other people are sleeping, I'm awake. I always liked that. I like being able to drive when there's no traffic. It's almost like you own the street at night.
Andrew Dice Clay
