Quote

When I meet a new person, something has to be a little off for me to consider them beautiful. It could be crooked teeth, or veins in their skin that are a little too visible, or a really dramatic lazy eye. The first guy I ever kissed had a water head.

Amy Sedaris

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Amy Sedaris
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: March 29
Actor
Actress
Comedian
Film Actor
Novelist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Endicott
New York
Amy Louise Sedaris
Firsts
Eye
Visible
First
Water
Skin
Something
Beautiful
Teeth
Really
Littles
Skins
Crooked
Persons
Consider
Kissed
Person
Meet
Veins
Ever
Head
Lazy
Little
Guy
Dramatic

More quotes by Amy Sedaris

Image
Usually, the best ideas come from other people's good ideas, which then, after a short gestation period, become your ideas.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I like to make things, but I looked at old craft books on weaving or mosaics or whatever, I'm like, 'I don't really know anything about that stuff.'
Amy Sedaris
Image
I listen. I like to give advice. Mostly, Ill just try to listen to my friends, and theyll say the same thing over and over again.
Amy Sedaris
Image
A lot of times girls think they're funny, but they want to pretty at the same time, and if you want to be funny, you have to be willing to get ugly.
Amy Sedaris
Image
Most people think witches are a coven of lesbians dancing naked in the forest celebrating the semen stolen from imprisoned hypnotized males, which they then use to inseminate one another using turkey basters in order to create a legion of demon babies. Well, that's only part of it. We are also active in community outreach programs.
Amy Sedaris
Image
Don't make anybody a homemade gift. Unless you're really good, or it's going to be really practical. If it's a little thing you think is cute 'cause you made it, just forget it.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I like working with the public, I like working with food, and I like making cash.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I have a lot of fake food in my apartment, but I'm picky about it. Old plaster food, like from the '50s is really nice, hollowed out paper-mache food from old plays - the new stuff just looks too good.
Amy Sedaris
Image
That's how all theater should be done - you only have one chance to see it and then it's gone. One night only.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I did shoplift but I didn't get in trouble for it. I shoplifted a lot when I was little. Candy. I would steal candy.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I'm not a first-place person.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I’ve named everything that I’ve ever owned. Real or inanimate, I have to give it a first and last name. Everything in my apartment comes alive at night.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I like to play unattractive people who think they're pretty. You can do what you want, but I prefer to look interesting.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I like to be around entertaining people. Even if they're bored, and you're in a convalescent home, there's something entertaining about that, in a way.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I was just a kid. I think I stole a candy bar. I remember feeling so terrible. It was the worst shock. I was probably 7. That's my least favorite feeling: guilt.
Amy Sedaris
Image
You know when you watch old movies, it's always the small parts you remember, the character actors who come in like a breath of fresh air.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I'm not very good with drink recipes. If I'm entertaining, I like to come up with a house drink for the evening, one thing I'll make for the whole evening of the whole month.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I think it's good for a person to spend time alone. It gives them an opportunity to discover who they are and to figure out why they are always alone.
Amy Sedaris
Image
Sometimes, to keep things exciting, I decorate my house as if I owned a child. I'll toss a tiny pair of shoes in the hallway or lean small wooden crutches in what I refer to as 'the baby's room,' which is actually a tiny space where I make things. I continue to call it the baby's room because it confuses people and it's creepy.
Amy Sedaris
Image
I am an aging Girl Scout.
Amy Sedaris