Quote

I have a lot of fake food in my apartment, but I'm picky about it. Old plaster food, like from the '50s is really nice, hollowed out paper-mache food from old plays - the new stuff just looks too good.

Amy Sedaris

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Amy Sedaris
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: March 29
Actor
Actress
Comedian
Film Actor
Novelist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Endicott
New York
Amy Louise Sedaris
Nice
Plaster
Stuff
Plasters
Play
Picky
Looks
Apartment
Really
Fake
Good
Plays
Like
Paper
Food
Hollowed

More quotes by Amy Sedaris

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When you hear someone use the word 'meds' instead of the word 'medicine,' chances are they're no stranger to massive doses of mind-altering psychotropic drugs. Back out of the room slowly.
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I don't really consider myself to be a comedian. I mean, it's not like I'm sitting around writing jokes or anything. I just like dressing up and pretending to be other people.
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I can't imagine going to an all-girls school. I went to a public school.
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Don't answer the door in a wedding dress and veil, he might not think you're joking.
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Crafting is putting ideas into action and then holding them together with an inexpensive adhesive.
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My favorite things often have a story behind them and are usually handmade or discovered at a flea market.
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I listen. I like to give advice. Mostly, Ill just try to listen to my friends, and theyll say the same thing over and over again.
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I always knew I didn't want kids, and I didn't want to get married.
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I always liked my teachers, and I was in a lot of after-school projects. I was a Girl Scout until my senior year, when I couldn't be a Girl Scout anymore. I was in clubs like Junior Achievement, and I ran track and field. My grades were good, but then toward 11th grade they were nothing. I always went to summer school.
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I'm not a good storyteller. I always think I'm going to get interrupted, or something's going to get edited. I think that comes from being in a large family, so you have to get your story in really quick or someone cuts you off.
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I feel confident writing on my feet with improv, but it's different when you're sitting down and writing it out.
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More men than women like 'Strangers With Candy'. Pretty girls don't like the show. They don't like to see an ugly lady.
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Sometimes, to keep things exciting, I decorate my house as if I owned a child. I'll toss a tiny pair of shoes in the hallway or lean small wooden crutches in what I refer to as 'the baby's room,' which is actually a tiny space where I make things. I continue to call it the baby's room because it confuses people and it's creepy.
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When I meet a new person, something has to be a little off for me to consider them beautiful. It could be crooked teeth, or veins in their skin that are a little too visible, or a really dramatic lazy eye. The first guy I ever kissed had a water head.
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Don't associate me with comedy. And please don't say actress. I would never call myself any of those things. I hate it when people call me that.
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They just expected it to you know... Paul, Steve and I could have hired our own publicist, if we wanted to, but I kind of liked the way it was more of a cult thing and those that liked it, liked it, you know what I mean?
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I like to entertain in all aspects. When you're with somebody and you're out, you want to be entertained.
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Most people think witches are a coven of lesbians dancing naked in the forest celebrating the semen stolen from imprisoned hypnotized males, which they then use to inseminate one another using turkey basters in order to create a legion of demon babies. Well, that's only part of it. We are also active in community outreach programs.
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My mother always said 'Don't bother other people.' I think that's good advice.
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I love theatrical props: a cup filled with solid fake tea, say, or a collection of fake food, including a rubber turkey, which, during the holidays, I wrap in tinfoil so it appears to have just come out of the oven.
Amy Sedaris